I still haven't got my laptop. And I'm sure getting real frustrated here. I have got other things ready, but the main character is not here yet, so just what can i do with a printer and a laptop lock I would like to know?!

I just watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory! Oooh it's a good movie. Full house somemore, and several were adult audiences. I guess that is so coz many of us grew up with Roald Dahl, and many of us were intrigued by the idea of a chocolate river, and the boat made of boiled candy, Oompa-Loompas etc that we just had to see it. I think this version is great. Charlie is exactly as I imagined him to look like, as was Grandpa Joe. Veruca Salt and Augustus Gloop were well-chosen, though I kinda think Augustus Gloop looks quite fake. Anyway, I think Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka was a really good choice. He was every bit the Willy Wonka I imagined- witty, sarcastic, eccentric. But I think Johnny Depp added dimension to the character of Wonka, by his facial expressions that seemed to suggest more than what he was saying (of course, I say this because I was unable to actually imagine Willy Wonka's actual expressions when he was talking in the story. I could only take his words in the book at face-value....). As you may have heard many people saying already, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (CCF) is not all candies and children and fun. There is a dark side to it, suggested first by the burning up of the dolls that were singing "Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka.." That scene was so reminiscent of Happy Tree Friends- so innocently cute, then they start catching fire due to some malfunction of the system (or was it?), then the dolls start to melt, and the music becomes like that of a spoilt recorder. AND THEN Willy Wonka appears beside the visitors, clapping enthusiastically like the whole show went according to plan, including the burnt dolls and spoilt music. His pleasure at that was kinda disturbing, together with the beginning part of the dolls getting spoilt of course. I felt like it was a hint that behind a facade of sweetness, innocence and supposed paradise, there lies an uglier truth, which in my opinion seems to be that Willy Wonka became such a successful chocolatier because of the repression (imposed by his father) he went thru when he was young. He wasn't allowed to eat sweets or chocolates or anything that was remotely sweet. I think the problem didn't totally lie in the fact that his father was a dentist; I think it was more so the fact that his father was a "famous dentist". So... u know, the image that he has to live up to as a famous dentist, might make him feel compelled to make sure his son doesn't have any cavities? That's my speculation. But anyway, I digress. It was a somewhat controlled childhood Willy Wonka had when he was a child, which caused him to grow up disliking adults and link them with authority, control, and stifling of creativity, and thereby disliking even the word "parents". And it was shown several times, that Wonka's past was haunting him, making him unhappy.

Another part that was a little disturbing (but quite amusing) was that Wonka seemingly goaded the children into getting into trouble. He never did seem to actually forcefully stop the children from doing watever they were determined to do. He appeared quite uncaring of what was going to happen to the children, in fact. Not that I was particularly concerned for those children, coz they were really brats, but, thing is, like the Veruca Salt incident- it was sooo obvious that he was taking his own time to find the key. And when he did find it, it was after Veruca was long gone, and the key had been put into the key-hole. He only turned it AFTER Veruca had disappeared, which soooo totally suggest that he planned it.

While watching the movie, it occurred to me that many events in Roald Dahl's story was reflective of children's mentality. Let's not talk bout his other books. Let's just focus on CCF. Don't you think many of the concepts in the story are reminiscent of what we thought about things when we were young? Like the television chocolate. When you were young, didn't you ever think why objects on tv looked so much smaller than real life, and haven you always wondered and fantasised about being able to reach into the tv to grab watever it is that you fancied? And the whipped cream thing. "Whipped cream is not whipped cream unless it has been whipped with whips" (or somethign like that) Haven't you ever wondered about stuff like that? I guess that's why Roald Dahl's books are such a hit. They verbalise what we children always fantasized or thought about, and make it into a story, and because it's like how we always imagined it to be, we kinda identify with it. Haha...

okok i know i'm getting carried away with it. There's just so much to say bout the movie! haha, I wouldn mind watching it one more time... haha.. =)

On to another issue that's been bugging me. Can a person change so much over a short period of time, say, less than a yr? I still find it hard to believe that someone who was well-mannered, filial, respectful and responsible turned into the opposite because of her peers and her bf. I mean, how is it possible that she could learn to despise her own roots and her father in less than a year? A period of time less than a year versus almost 18 years of her life. Wouldn't that 18 yrs be more than enough to prove her judgement wrong? I'm not trying to be moralistic here. I'm just surprised at the change which can overcome a person because of peer influence, and I'm trying to make sense of it all, because I feel that a person like her is simply too innocent for that. Or maybe it's coz I dun often keep in contact with her. No, make that no contact, unless its the times that she comes over for a holiday, and the last time was wat, 6 years or more ago? But from all accounts prior to this, she was a responsible and damn good sister, so this sudden news about her came as a shock, and I really feel very inclined to just ignore it all, simply because its NOT HER. Oh well, if this is true, I sure hope that it's just a phase that she's going through, otherwise it's very painful for her parents, and I think for her too.......

It's getting late... almost 12 already... Happy National Day in advance!

Zooming By....

OK, I only have less than 15 min to type, and MAN! My fingers have been itching to type to blog since Mon, but I've been too lazy to go downstairs to the comp room to use the computer, AND my laptop hasnt arrived yet, which makes the whole thing even more dandy. LAst week they told me it would take bout a week for it to arrive, so i went out and got the necessary equipment. NOW they tell me I have to wait 14 working days to get my laptop. And i was SO hoping to be able to bring it home this week and get the system up and running by next wk. -_-"

Cant blog much, just to say that I think I've gotten the hang of staying by myself here in the hostel. Dun think i'm too independent yet, coz i haven got round to washing my clothes myself(i'll get ther one day), but at least i dun feel as homesick as last week, and not as pessimisstic. For that I'm glad. Someone told me, "Move with change and enjoy it!" oh well, I'm trying to do this as best i can. I think with time I'll improve. =) wish me luck!

Went to the rotaract club tea session on mon, ended up missing the shuttle, so i had to walk home. argh. do u know wat time that was?! it was 9 something! close to 10 already, and the streets are quite dark, but for a few streetlights put up qutie a dist away from each other. one would thing the ntu personnel thought we had cats' eyes or something. then tues was ALMOST a repeat, as i went to attend the rotaract club's main comm interview. alas, it was not meant to be, coz i arived late and hence had to be the 35th person to be interviewed when it was only the NINTH person at that time. so, afraid of missing the shuttle and bathing extremely late and facing the prospect of having to blow dry my hair at an ungodly hour and risk killing my brain cells in the process, i decided to go back and go for the subcomm one next week. wish me luck for that! i'm more keen on the sub comm anyway. haha...

ok gtg. i'll be home tml! then i can blog in comfort......

"There's No Place Like Home"

This is one of the themes of the movie of the week of my course- "Cinematic Pleasures and the Question of Identity". The movie is "The Wizard of Oz". I'm sure all of you have heard of the story. I have, but I've never watched it before. Call me suaku, but I really don't regret watching it. It's a classic, and it's a nice change from the movies of today. Instead of the more often than not "shows of campiness and trampiness, trash and flash, decadent, fabulous flamboyance", it was a show with a little girl in a blue gingham gress, Lion, Tin Man and Scarecrow, not forgetting witches. To quote The Tribune, "It was a virtual festival of innocence".

One particular quote that caught my attention was this from Dorothy:

"Well, I - I think that it - it wasn't enough to just want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em - and it's that - if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is that right? "

That quote basically summarised what the movie was trying to say bout the main characters in the show- Dorothy, the Lion, the Scarecrow, and the Tin man. All of them wanted something that was inside them all along; it was just that they either didn't believe they had it in them, or they took it for granted. Well, I guess the latter applies to me. I never really thought much about home; granted, I always knew it's a place where I can seek comfort and refuge, but I never knew HOW MUCH of it, and I never knew HOW MUCH home meant to me until now. Haha, I know, you're probably already getting sick of reading bout me whining and whining bout how much i miss home and how home is sooooo great. OK, after this week, NO MORE whining. I guarantee u. =)

I also just learnt that my grand uncle- my father's uncle- is suffering from liver cancer, and he's now in a hospice, waiting for his time to be up. I can't think of any other tactful way of saying that he's waiting to die, so pls forgive the words. He can neither go for operation nor chemo, 'coz he's too weak and has diabetes, so he has no choice but to forego treatment. He has only 3-6 mths to live. I think knowing one has cancer and knowing how much longer one has to live are torturous facts to live with. Wouldn't one be unconsciously counting down the days, and keep worrying about when that day is going to come, and when that day comes, what will happen then? Where will they go? It's all the questions that nobody can answer, nor can anyone go with one. Of course, knowing how long one has to live might have its advantages, like, getting all of one's affairs straightened out, and maybe making the most out of one's last days. Still..... the thot of going thru everyday thinking about the unknown (what happens and what's going to happen to one after death) is quite frightening, don't u think? Well... it does frighten me, at least. I can't bear the thought of me dying, frankly. Not only the fact that I dunno what's in store for me on the other side so to speak, but I simply can't bear to leave my family behind. And now, I can only imagine what his daughter would feel, and his siblings. I know if someone I was close to passed away, I'd probably feel quite paralysed. I remember last year when I had the dream that I killed Yi Lun. Oh my god.... I was still crying when I woke up, and it took me quite awhile to shake off that sense of loss and grief. For the whole day I couldn stop thinking about it. Even now, thinking back on the dream makes me shudder. Dun ask me y i dreamt that I had killed her. I didn't quarrel with her the night before, nor do i hate her. =)

Ok, let's get off from this morbid thought. It's scary and it's depressing, and I've had alot of depressing entries in the past couple of weeks. It's time I looked ahead. After all, it's only 2 more months to a recess in Sept, and after that another 2 months before exams, and THEN the longer hols, and then Sem 2. Right? =) Of course, I can't only look forward to coming home each week and looking forward to all the available holidays. That would be BAAAAD. I gotta start being optimistic, so wish me luck, won't you? ;)

Oh, by the way, Schnoozee's photos have been posted up in my yahoo photo albums. Go see them!

Home Sweet Home

It's Sat, and how I wish it was still Fri, then I wouldn have to think about tomorrow, when I'll have to go back to the hostel. -_-" This time it'll be 5 days away from home! haha...

Ok, on a lighter note, I got a laptop! Finally managed to persuade my parents to buy me one. It's a Fujitsu! Haha, Fufu no 2 eh Bernice jiejie? ;) Duno whether to get a printer too, though it's an added bonus, albeit an expensive one. I think it would be v convenient to have one in the room, coz the printing room in the library is such a mad house, and the computer room with the printer has such a LOOOOOOOOONG queue!! But Jieting has a point too, in that a lot of printing will be done, and just using our own printer and ink will just waste SOOO much money... On the other hand, if there is alot of printing to be done, wouldn many trips to the library/comp rooms be required, which also means many trips to finding terminals in those places will be required, AND not to forget the fact that there is always the chance of the printers jamming up like in Jieting's case last week. I dun really relish the thought of having to queue countless times, and squeezing with many others in a cramped room..... or maybe i'm just spoilt. Ah well, nth beats home, where i can do anything i want without having to queue. Haha, i can jsut simply jump queue or kick von and lun off the chairs! Muahahahahahha. Nah, i dun do that. We co-operate. =) yah and i can do other thigns while waiting for the printing to start oso. How nice is it?

Haha, now, i'm going to enjoy my stay at home. Excusez Moi.... =)

Zooming by....

Thank God it's FRIDAY! I can go home! YAY! Though I just left home yesterday, it seems like it was a week ago. Haha... Nothing beats being at home I tell u, even though the company is good in the hostel and the envt is not too bad... Just heard that there's gonna be a series of hall events coming up soon, one of them being the Bottle in Six, where each block in hall 6 is supposed to come up with a skit. *shrugs* oh well, nothing has been said in our block, so I shall go on my merry way and pretend nth is going on... =p

Left the hostel room at 12 somthing, and decided to go explore Library 2, where it's said that that's where the textbooks are. Hrumph. couldn't see any regarding econs... which i'm having probs with after yesterday's disastrous lecture. It makes me wonder if i should continue taking that subj or not. But the thought of having to trawl thru the class schedules and stuff is sooooo daunting. think i'll just stick with it and hope for the best. Meanwhile, i hope i can manage to borrow the book from jieting for once a week. Otherwise, I'm seriously a goner. I wonder if my parents will allow me to bring a printer to the hostel? Coz printing stuff in the comp labs and the library is just so much of a mad rush. the printing room in the library itself is a mad house, with everyone squeezing to print their stuff. Not to mention that one has to grab a terminal in the library first before going to print the stuff in the printing room. And i thot a printer wasn necessary. It would help loads if the lecturers could upload the notes into the edveNTUre one week earlier so that we can go home and print though.... *looks hopefully* Yah, so back to my story. I couldn find any books in lib 2, so i loitered around said library in search of a terminal to do my readings on next week's lecture. I managed to find a terminal, but it was spoilt. -_-" Couldn bear with the thought of heading back to hostel, so decided to come to lee wee nam lib, where FINALLY i found a terminal and started. ALAS! i had thot there weren't any notes to print out for today's lecture, but it wasnt meant to be. the notes were posted yesterday, and i didn't know!! argh. So i had to copy them. Manually. =p yah, so that's how i spent my time from 1230 to bout 4, which is sooo not easy coz there are only so many thigns u can do in a lib. finding a terminal helped alot acty, so.... thanks to it, i managed to while my time away.

Ah. it's almost 4. Time to make my way to lecture. Let's just hope and pray hard that i'll find the place and come out of the LT with my brain still intact.

Home beckons....!!!!

One and a half more hours......

Back! For a limited period.

I'm back(!)... after 1 day of staying in the hostel. Haha... In case you are wondering if I have given up staying in the hostel due to my homesickness, I'm sorry to say, you wondered wrong! =) It's coz there are no classes today, and I figured since I miss home so much and I have nothing to do back in the hostel, I might as well come home to enjoy my room and the comforts of home. =) Do u know something irritating?! Initially, I thought I could stay at home and go homr on thurs/fri night, and i was sooo happy! unfortunately, there came an announcement saying that there's gonna be a make up lecture on thurs, and the weird time of 430pm. MY GOODNESS!!! that time is sooo not here not there ok! so I'll have to go down with my father prob during lunch time, where i'll stay in the room till bout 4, then make my way down to the LT and spend 2 hours down there, and then spend the night in the hostel, and on fri, spend the day in the hostel room until 4 again, then go down to the LT, and spend ONE hour down there then go home. OMG. What kind of a timetable is this rite?! ARGH. the lessons are so late in the day! at such funny times somemore! It wouldn help if i dropped that subj, coz i still have a tutorial earlier in the day for some other subj. =( nvm. i'll jsut stick with it for another 13 weeks, then it'll be over! lalalalaa.... incidentally, is 13 weeks = 1 semester? why do all my lessons last for 13 weeks if 13 weeks is not = 1 sem? i dun understand.

anyway, the hostel is quite nice. quiet environment, and the air is really fresh in the morning. I haven't breathed air that fresh in the morning since I was in primary 2. Haha.... My roommate Serene is nice too! haha, considerate and sweet. =) It's just that the toilet leaves MUCH to be desired though. Blocked sinks, with hair inside them somemore, stained mirrors.... all these seem to be able to set the stage for some horror movie doesn't it? =) Luckily we found a toilet at the furthest end of our block, where it's much cleaner. Not only are there more cubicles to bathe in, but the the toilet's bright, the sinks are clean AND unblocked. hehe... it's still kinda scary to visit the toilet at night though....

ntu's LARGE. Unfortunately or fortunately- it all depends on ur perspective- it seems a much wider choice all around to walk instead of taking a bus or a shuttle, coz the transport goes one loop around the campus. haha... so ALOT of walking is involved, particularly when one can't find the place one is supposed to go to. THEN it gets downright frustrating. And tiring. But overall, it's.... quite an eye-opening experience. EXPERIENCE NANYANG!

Sometimes when all is quiet, i get the feeling that NTU is a civilisation all by itself. I mean, it's so self-contained (we have the Nanyang Supermarket, a hairdressing salon which has been around longer than I've been alive, hostels, accomodation for the staff, recreation places...). We seem to be so far away from the outside world, which to me, seems... kinda lonely. It's kind of like I'm the only one left behind in my family, wandering the world.... ;) I know it sounds pessimisstic and all, but I guess this makes me just treasure my family and the time i spend with them even more. So, i guess, in the long run, this is an experience i will look back on with a smile and say with gratitude, "Thank God for the chance to stay in the hostel. Now I know how warm my family and home is." and in addition to that, I'd have learnt to live on my own, and how to take care of my own stuff. Haha, and if (I ever) have my own children next time, they can't argue with me that staying in the hostel is not good. MUAHAHAHAHAHA they cant fool me!!

Lastly, special thanks to bernice jiejie, who smsed me after she read my blog entry and consoled me- u know, the really depressed sounding one?- it was great and a PLEASANT surprise to receive ur sms!! =)

And to alan oso, for adding that note to my tagboard, which seemed to put staying in the hostel in a more positive light, though i haven't figured out how it made it so. It just seemed better somehow. hee...

ok, so back to the hostel i'll go tomorrow, and though i'll still feel reluctant to go, at least this time i'll know what i'm in for, and there is also the prospect of returning home in another 2 days' time! =)

Last Day

*Sob!* for the next 5 days, i shall be staying in the hostel, somewat away from civilisation, without computers and tv..!! oh man... i dunno how i'm gonna do that. I'm still very attached to the abovementioned sources of entertainment, and the 9pm show! ahh!!! i was just getting into the show, and now i have to pry my brains and eyes away from it.

Staying in another place (even if it's only 5 days a week) is quite hard for me, actually, no matter what ppl say bout needing to be independent etc. I've been staying with my family for 19 years, and we see each other day in day out, it will be kinda hard to live with the fact that i'm gonna have to see them only twice a week, and not be able to take part in daily conversations with them and catch up with them with whatever has gone on in their lives everyday. There's gonna be no more listening to how the day was every dinner, and no more tokking to yi lun until the wee hours of the nite, when i'm trying to slp or read and she's telling me more bout wat happened in sch, or vice versa, no more complaining bout schnoozee and his ungentlemanliness or his loose bladder with evon... not that i ever felt i could live without all these, but i just never thot that the day would come so soon when i would have to stay away from them for 6 months, only seeing them twice a week. I guess i sound wimpish, whining so much bout staying in the hostel, especially when the hostel is still in Singapore, the well known "little red dot". Well... thats true, but i'm in BOON LAY!! Where is my family? in BEDOK! it seems like another state for all i care. I like having familiars around me, and now that i'm suddenly moving to another place, especially a place where i seldom go, or had no knowledge of its geography until recently, it certainly feels like home is suddenly like on another planet. no doubt there are friends with me, but i do still crave for the warmth of family. My family.

Haha, just thinking bout this makes me teary already. I guess I'll get used to it soon. I hope i DO get used to it soon, or i'll be in deep trouble man.. haha... i guess this is good training to live on my own...

I miss home already.......

Matriculation

WHEW! Matriculation's finally done, and so is registration of subjects. Goodness, imagine having to do the same thing 7 more times! I'm just so gonna die. haha...

Initially I had thot that I had chosen all my subj properly. OMG was I ever so wrong in that. You see, I had chosen 2 additional Psychology subj, happily thinking that I could complete the course faster. However, I had failed to understand the paper that was sent to us. It said, "Choose subjects that do not have any pre-requisites". And what did I do? I very merrily went on my way and researched on those subjects, conveniently forgetting that they had pre-requisites to them. -_-" And then I had to suffer a nasty shock today upon realising my error. I mean, how dense can I be? So I started the process all over again. Researching on whatever subjects I wanted to take, checking vacancies, exam timetables, class schedules...... Sheesh!

Oh well, all that's over now, thank goodness! I dun think I'm going to do anymore adding or dropping during the add/drop subj period. I'm content with mine. Well, except for one of the courses, where I'll be rushing like a mad woman. Hmm, I think it's Wednesday. My lessons are mostly in the afternoon somemore. I've got one morning one though, on thurs, but it's not too early, so thank god for that. Not that I'd mind earlier, coz the earlier i finish them, the earlier i can go off to do watever i wanna do in the afternoon u see.... =) I haven fully analysed my timetable yet.... further updates after I have analysed it. =) I registered for one course called Cinematic Pleasures and the Question of Identity. Haha, it sounds so Rossetti, but I think it's kinda interesting. Perhaps also something that won't be too foreign? Looking forward to that lesson, though I think few other ppl I know are going to take that subj. Hmm, so anyone in NTU whom I know, I hope u find this subj interesting and register for it k? Then we can take lessons in that together! =)

Ramblings

Hey Alan, I just added you to my links... hope u dun mind... =)

Ok, I think I've had enough of trying to type with the politically correct spellings etc. It's tiring and troublesome. Can you imgine having to backspace everytime you happen to spell or grammatize some word tt's not in the Queen's English when you are in a hurry to blog down ur thoughts in case you forget wat you wanted to say? Well, it's quite irritating.

4 more days to the Big Move. By Big Move, I mean moving to the hostel, where I'll stay for 5 days before going home on Fri, and going back again on Sunday night. Haha, it kinda feels like I'm in NS, doesn it? I can't say if I'm excited or apprehensive about spending my time in the hostel, coz there's a mixed feeling of both. On one hand, it's exciting coz for the first time, I'm going to stay on my own, with Serene, and everything will have to be done by me. No more help from my parents, Mira, my sisters.... Communication will be restricted to handphones and maybe MSN, but I can't really depend on MSN, coz i dun have a laptop or a PC. Haven been able to persuade my parents to buy me one or get someone to assemble one for me... haha, pray hard that I'll be able to get one soon, won't you? =) No computer= No Internet = No blogging + No MSN+ No checking mail+ No surfing net= Boredom OR = Hardworking-ness. The scales could tip either way, and I'm hoping it's the latter. Ok, the apprehensive side is also because I'll be staying on my own, with a roommate, with no one else to depend on. Besides, there is the added factor of not having Lun to talk to at night, no wonderful homecooked meals form Mira, no one to do my laundry (haha, yep i know, completely spoilt. Let's hope there'll be improvement from me), and generally, homesickness. Not that rooming with Serene is not good. It's just that at times, one yearns for the comforts of home? =)

OK, on to the next topic: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I dun wanna spoil the suspense for any of you who haven't read the book, but suffice it to say that I'm heartbroken that Dumbledore died (this is hardly called spoiling the suspense- after all, it was all over the news as to who died in the latest book. It's just that I refused to listen to it... haha... ), and disappointed that it was someone from the Order who betrayed them, but at the same time, the book was heartwarming in the sense that love and relationships was the emphasised theme throughout the book, and I'm glad some relationships were formed. Makes me happy. So, all in all, the latest installation of Harry Potter lives up to its standards, though the book didn't grip me in the early stages of the plot. It was towards the end that I found it hard to tear myself away from the book, such that I was unable to do much else except read it the whole day. Now, I shan't spoil the story any further; wait till the Harry Potter hype has gone on a bit longer, and more ppl have read it, then maybe more will be said bout the story? On the other hand though, I think there'll be little need to talk more bout the story, coz by then, almost everyone would know what the story is all about. Well, we can discuss the story to bits then, though, and make sure u all discuss it to bits on my tagboard ok? Well.... seeing as there is hardly any activity there, I would love to see a dissection of Harry Potter on my board... or any other kind of discussion!! =)

Tomorrow is matriculation day for freshmen. Been having nagging feelings regarding them seriously. Worrying about what courses to take to complete the Major, what Minors to take, whether the courses clash, what to do if they do clash, vacant spaces, prerequisites, and whether the courses are even offered in the first semester. Hopefully things will turn out fine tmr and I can breathe a sigh of relief and happily live out the rest of my holidays at home. =)

I just watched the National Day song by Taufik and Ruien. They look kinda weird, singing together, but... to my untrained ears, they sound rather fine. Pleasant, but not spectacular. It's funny, though, that the song is not broadcast as frequently as other years. In previous years, the songs were played between shows, at night, and in every channel. Now, it seems like they are only being broadcast at later times like 11, and even then, I seem to see it broadcast on CNA more often than on the free-to-air channels. Why is that so then? Curious, curious. I particularly liked the shot of the Lions hoisting the Tiger Cup trophy in the music video. The euphoric faces of the team made me smile along with them- it was not only the fact that it meant Singapore had won the Tiger Cup for the first time in, wat, 6 yrs(?) , but also because they looked so darn happy at having won the Cup. I get easily influenced by the emotions of those around me, including books, movies, etc. Emotional? Yah, I guess so. Oh, and Taufik looks nice in a suit. I think suits are the kind of clothes he looks the best in. Suits and leather jackets. They suit his style- sleek and suave. Haha.... aren't I right? =)

Went out with Yan Fang and Ya Ying last Friday- we went to Somerset to watch the Jap movie "Be With You", then went to the Esplanade for dinner. I didn't know that the hawker area outside the Esplanade was made up of the stalls Makansutra advertised! So we each had a plate of Char Kway Teow to ourselves. Well... it was not bad, but I think kinda salty. Haha, but the company more than made up for it! I must make a note to bring my parents there one day.

Ok, these are the photos we took while we were out....


Yaying and me... This was taken on the bridge leading from Boat Quay to City Hall... the scenery is nice right? That's the first time I've been out so long... haha... =)


Yan Fang, Yaying and me... inside Fullerton Hotel. Hehe, we were all thinking what a shame it is that being Singaporeans, we have never stepped into The Fullerton Hotel. Well, we went in and took a look, and... taking the risk of sounding suaku, Fullerton is sooooo luxurious! soft lighting everywhere, spacious spaces, marble spiral staircases leading to ballrooms downstairs, plush sofas in the lobby, and looking up, one can see the rooms which have balconies looking down into the lobby.


Another picture of the 3 of us, at the same place. Haha, this time with Yan Fang shorter, 'cos a certain someone said she was too tall for her......


Yan Fang and me... same location as the one taken of Yaying and me. Haha, I'd love to go see that scenery again! =)

All these pictures were taken courtesy of Yan Fang's handphone, and well, they do bring back great memories! =)

3 Girls + 1 Whole Day = ??

Haha, you get a mad shopping frenzy. =) I think we went a little crazy on Monday, walking through the popular shopping areas in Bugis. We went from Bugis Junction to Bugis Village, then seeing that most of the shops weren't open yet, went to OG, then to the roadside shops, then to Bugis Village, then to Bugis Junction then back to Bugis Village again. Haha... We spent the WHOLE day there, as you can see. Haha, it was detours the whole time, but to me, that was all part of the fun in shopping. =) Oh, who did I go with? I went with Jieting and Jiun Pey, and it was SO FUN! Haha, we should do this again. =) It was only after that outing that I realised there's a difference between normal long pants and 4 quarter pants. Yep, I know what you are thinking. 4 Quarters? Isn't that one whole already? Haha, you would be right. Technically. Unfortunately, normal long pants are longer than 4 quarter pants. Just think of it as normal long pants are 5 quarters- improper fraction. Then perhaps it'd be easier? Haha, interesting ain't it? That particular shopping titbit was brought to you courtesy of Miss Tang Jieting. =)

Dinner was at Billy Bombers, and oh man! I love that place! I'm not sure about other branches of Billy Bombers, but the one at Bugis was quaint. The setting is reminiscent of Grease the movie, you know, the movie starring John Travolta and Olivia Newton John? It was so vintage! There was a mini antique jukebox on each table. I think at one time, customers were allowed to use the jukebox. Alas! I went there too late, or I would have loved to be able to play with it. -_-" The food was not bad as well, so that further hardens my resolve to take my family there. Haha. Anyone has any idea if there are nearer branches of Billy Bombers nearer to where I stay?

Shopping has been my staple activity these days. Last Friday, I just went shopping with Mel too. Haha, what can I say? It was fun too! Haha, love shopping with my friends! We went to Orchard Road's Far East, then walked to CK Tang, then..... hmm... I can't remember where else. Heh, suffice it to say that alot of shopping was done, and most were done by Mel. Haha, remember the bag and tops Mel? Well, a lot was bought, but I think they were all gorgeous merchandises. =) Serious! The bag Mel bought was soo nice, it made me so tempted to go buy a bigger version of the bag. My excuse? To hold my clothes when I move to Hall. Unfortunately or fortunately- depends on how you look at it- my conscience stepped in and persuaded me not to buy it. So now I'm kinda lusting after it, though I know I won't be able to part with the money. Haha... =)

Well, while shopping has its euphoric moments, like the moment the cashier hands us the bag with whatever we bought inside, the downside is the aftermath. Besides realising (with dismay- for me, that is) that alot of money was spent in exchange for the times of happiness, there is the consequence of buying too many clothes- handwashing them for the first time. Argh. That's the part I don't like very much, especially when it involves bottomes. They are so super heavy! And that's what I have to do later. Been washing my new clothes so often (because of the amount of shopping I've done) that I think I'm the sole user of the bottle of white vinegar we keep in the house. Since the time it was opened (by me), it has been serving the sole purpose of preserving my clothes. Makes me wonder if I should might as well just buy a bottle for myself. Hehe.... =)

Pain. In EVERY sense of the word

Main Entry: 1pain
Pronunciation: 'pAn
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old French peine, from Latin poena, from Greek poinE payment, penalty; akin to Greek tinein to pay, tinesthai to punish, Avestan kaEnA revenge, Sanskrit cayate he revenges
1 : PUNISHMENT
2 a : usually localized physical suffering associated with bodily disorder (as a disease or an injury); also : a basic bodily sensation induced by a noxious stimulus, received by naked nerve endings, characterized by physical discomfort (as pricking, throbbing, or aching), and typically leading to evasive action
b : acute mental or emotional distress or suffering : GRIEF
3 plural : the throes of childbirth4 plural : trouble, care, or effort taken to accomplish something
5 : one that irks or annoys or is otherwise troublesome -- often used in such phrases as pain in the neck

Yah. But what I was referring to was mainly explanations 2a and 5. Lemme try to explain it:

My shoulders and neck are painful. See? That's explanation 2a. It's irritating I tell you. I think it's to do with the sleeping position. I currently have 4 pillows, and they are either too soft, too low, too high, or too.... inflexible. It's getting harder to sleep! and I end up with a stiff neck in the morning and sore shoulders. Irritating.

Next: explanation 5.
As you probably know by now, I'm moving into the hostel soon, and it is a pain to prepare for it. ARGH. So many things to pack, and I'm starting to agree with Christina Rossetti, that suspension is usually better than the real thing, because fantasy is more often than not better than the reality, 'cos expectations can be as high as you like. Haha. THINKING about hostel life is exciting, like what to do there, etc, but actually getting down to the REAL PACKING is a PAIN. I just procrastinate and procrastinate, and even I'm getting annoyed at myself. Just can't seem to pull myself away from the daily slacking and actually get down to make a list of the things I need. Incidentally, does anyone know if they charge extra for putting fridges inside? Or if they provide pillows...? OK, and any further suggestions for what to bring into the hostel....? Just any suggestions you can think of, 'cos I'm so afraid I might forget something in my list. Haha... suggestions are welcome!!! just leave a tag at my board, and I'll be grateful.

Also, I'm not very sure if I want to attend the hall orientation. It sounds interesting, and the person who called me sounded rather nice. I wasn't very keen in the first place, cos I thought I would be attending the HSS one. BUT they told me they had a quota to fill, and me inside would be over quota. So, it turned out that I didn't go for any orientation. So I was wondering if I should go for this one.... hmm..... Oh, and Jiarong says only 5 guys turned up for the HSS camp. Hahaa.... I think this year's attendance will be mostly made up of girls... =)

Ok, so help me in my list, pls!!!!

Bidding.... In a Different Sense

Today is the last day the candidates can sway the IOC judges for the privilege of hosting the 2012 Olympics. I watched the live broadcast of the 5 presentations today, and I must say, all 5 countries did a good job. Their presentations were professionally done, and it did seem like they were well prepared for the Q&A session, though I suspect Moscow was hoping and praying that one of the questions would not be about the Chechnyan (is that how it's spelt?) rebels. If I remember correctly, that question wasn't asked.

I was especially impressed by Paris, New York, and London's presentations. Paris, because it made me feel happy because of the bright colours and the happy atmosphere. I felt like if Paris was chosen, I would be guaranteed a great time at the Games, and I would be exposed to everything they have to offer- culture, Eiffel Tower, the people, and.... the dogs. haha... oh, and not forgetting the quaint little shops. Remember Chocolat? yep, that show/book was set in France, and the setting was soooo quaint! I would love to go to France to see if there are still shops like that. Not that I would go to France if Paris was chosen. On the other hand, who knows what will happen in 7 years? Maybe I'll be financially independent by then and be able to go there....? =) Imagine watching the triathlon, marathon and cycling at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, as shown in the picture below:




New York... was because I felt they were very well rounded in their presentation. The explanation and the 'tour' around the Olympic grounds were very well done. Explanations were clear, organised, and the venues look to have been carefully thought out, such that the venues were all within easy reach of the athletes. Imagine " the entire triathlon in the Park, with cycling on the loop, running on the jogging paths, and swimming in the Reservoir". Wow. Gorgeous. Oh, and contrary to what Life! said about the dressing of the NY delegates, I felt that their dressing strongly indicated the sincerity of the delegates. They were dressed in Olympic colours, which suggested that they were doing this all in the spirit of the Games, and they understood what it means to be able to host the Olympics in 2012.

London. Wow. I was impressed by the way they spoke, their videoclip, and their aim for organising the Games. Firstly, it might be superficial to be impressed with the way they spoke, or with their accents (incidentally, I do love British accents. Not the common British accent, but the Tony Blair accent. Don't you think it sounds so crisp and clear?), but hey, aren't first impressions formed not only by one's dressing, but also by the way one speaks? Wouldn't a clear Western accent be better able to hold the audience's attention? Secondly and thirdly are their videoclip and their aim for organising the Games. Their videoclip emphasised again and again their vision for the Games- to inspire the younger generation, and to improve the lives of the Londoners now, and the future, hence their theme song "Proud" by Heather Small. Below is the lyrics for the song.

Proud -Heather Small
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
It's never too late to try
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
You could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom
What have you done today to make you feel proud?

Still so many answers I don't know
Realise that to question is how we grow
So I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same

What have you done today to make you feel proud?
It's never too late to try
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
You could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom
What have you done today to make you feel proud?

We need a change
Do it today
I can feel my spirit rising
We need a change
So do it today
'Cause I can see a clear horizon

What have you done today to make you feel proud?
So what have you done today to make you feel proud?
'Cause you could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom
So what have you done today to make you feel proud?
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
What have you done today
You could be so many people?
Just make that break for freedom
So what have you done today to make you feel proud?

I look into the window of my mind
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same

To quote one of the children in the video, the Games will "encourage more people to get involved, not only in being successful as an athlete, but generally in the community", which I think basically summarised London's whole presentation, and also secured the IOC members' votes. One quote was particularly touching, when a young boy declared, "I want to run for my country". Childish, perhaps, but it was nonetheless filled with the innocent hope only children can have, and it was touching because it made me remember my childhood dreams, and the innocence of that age. Besides, can you imagine playing Beach Volleyball outside this grand building (The Horse Guards Parade):



Nice, ain't it?

As for Moscow and Madrid, Moscow has my sympathies, 'cause just before the day of their presentation was the threat by the rebels, which I'm sure affected their presentation and the IOC members' decisions. The presentation by Moscow was sombre, and their solemn attitude throughout the presentation was, of coursealso reflected by their attire (yes, I agree with Life! 's comment about their attire being too sombre). I think it was the rebels' threats that created that mood among the Moscow-vites to be so solemn, and caused them to appear rather rigid. One bright spot, though, was the appearance of Alexander Popov, who is one droolworthy swimmer. Haha... =)

Madrid... well, I slept through their presentation (sorry Hurul!) 'cos I was just too sleepy to watch on. I watched their final video, though, and it was impressive. They showed fabulous footages of Madrid, its scenery, and its people. All of them saying, "See you in Madrid!" made me somehow wish that they would be chosen. Of course, this was aided by the fact that Iker Casillas, and Antonio Banderas invited me (and everyone else watching the video of course) there. All the welcomes I heard made me feel, well, welcomed.

Watching the 5 countries' presentations made me realise that Singapore will not be able to host the Olympics. Ever. Nope, I'm not being un-patriotic by being such a wet blanket. I'm being honest. It's not only because of the size of our country, and it's also not only because Singapore does not have a reputation of churning out gold medals like a factory. It's because:

1. Singapore does not have the scenery- well if the Olympics was hosted here, would we have the Regatta in Kallang River? Singapore River? Or MacRitchie Reservoir? Where would we host the Triathlon? Running and cycling around the perimeter of Singapore, then swimming in one of the above rivers/ reservoir? There is a good place for Beach Volleyball though. If Paris has it under/ in front of the Eiffel Tower, and London has it in front of the Horse Guards Parade, then surely, we can have it in front of the Esplanade? After all, there is a fantastic view of the Bay, and the Esplanade IS our pride and joy.

2. Singapore does not have the infrastructure

3. Singaporeans don't have the same intensity of enthusiasm the above 5 countries have for sports. Look at Madrid. One of their slogans was "We celebrate sports". Do we celebrate sports? Probably in the passive way, like betting on which teams will win which sport. For now, perhaps, sports has not reached the same level of importance as academia, so we cannot possibly declare that "We celebrate sports". Probably a more appropriate slogan would be "We celebrate sportsmanship"? After all, we take pride in sending our Team Singapore to the various international games, including the Olympics. Part of the spirit of the Games, surely, is that winning is not important. What's important is that we have tried. We tried at every tournament, and I think it takes a lot of guts to actually send a team in for competitions despite not winning everything most of the time. We did try, and I have no doubt that Team Singapore tries their best every time (who can stand losing? and it IS an honour to win international awards for the country you know), and it just so happens that our forte is not in sports, but in academia. Perhaps it cannot be helped that academia has to be emphasised on greatly in Singapore, simply because WE ARE SMALL, and the markets that are the most lucrative demand people who are strong in academics. Perhaps over time, sports will be more recognised in Singapore? But following the laws of Economics that we learnt in JC, the opportunity cost of doing so is too high, simply because the only resource we have is our people.

I guess in these 3 points, I sound very resentful of the fact that Singapore will not be able to ever host the Olympics. However, I would like to clarify (should there be a barrage of hate tags on my tagboard and The Straits Times criticises me for my insolence and over-generalisation; but oh, what the hell, it's not as if my blog is some high profiled blog or something. But it does pay to be prepared), that I am NOT being resentful. I was stating my observations. I am aware that Singapore provides a high level of security and cleanliness and order and a world-class (though expensive) transportation (I think), but I am also aware that Singapore, though very very very well-organised, simply does not have what the other countries have. We are able to host summits of world leaders, large meetings like the IOC meeting, but would we be able to host such a high profiled event when SO MANY people all over the world will be descending upon us? Do we even have enough hotel rooms I wonder. Yep, and I am NOT being insolent. Over-generalisation, perhaps, but definitely NOT insolent. I did mean it when I said the Esplanade is a good place for Beach Volleyball, and I DID mean it when I said "We celebrate sportsmanship", because we really do. And I do admire the government's efforts to make Singaporeans love sports, and have a greater awareness that there is a life beyond academia. Otherwise, why set up the Singapore Sports School?

Ok, I have defended myself, and I hope it is to whoever-wants-to-kill-me's satisfaction. PLEASE, Straits Times, if you want to expose me, PLEASE don't publish my name or my blog address. I'll have to move to the moon if you do so. Haha, nah, I'm just kidding. =)

the past few days....

ok haven been blogging these few days, since sat. let's start from today:

i absolutely LOVE this song!! on ur speakers! it sounds so sincere and simple, and i guess to the romantics, it kinda reflects how one would feel when one meets his/her one true love. not that i have met one yet, but i imagine that that's how it feels. =)

my biggest thanks to Ida, of the website ida-here.com, who made this possible. i swear, her website is one wonderful treasure trove of goodies- music codes, blog layouts, and, yes, VIDEO codes. thinking of getting a video code, but not now. =)

Bless the Broken Road - Rascal Flatts
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to youB
ut you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

Yesterday (4 july)
went shopping (yay! but doesn't it seem like i'm doing that very often these days?) with von and lun. we were planning to go bugis, 'cause lun said that there's a neoprint machine there that makes metallic pictures and since we haven't taken neoprints together for a looooong time, we decided to try it out. yes yes, neoprints are so passe i here u say, but let's just say that it was vanity at work, and sentimentality.

alas, we changed our destination and went to *gasp!* Orchard Road! (not much of a surprise actually, 'cause that's where we usually go), but this time, it wasn't to taka or wisma. instead, it was to the Heeren Shops and Cineleisure. it was quite fun there, we went into like practically every shop. i saw Yan Fang at Cineleisure too!! couldn recognise her, which sure makes me worry about my memory. but then again, fang did look kinda different.

anyway, the Heeren Shops was the place where i had a plentiful harvest. haha, my main aim of going there was to get the Fossil wallet i've been eyeing for the past year but haven't been able to gather the courage to buy, 'cause i haven't had a valid reason for doing so. this time around, however, i did have a good reason- my wallet, the one lun bought for me, is spoilt! haha, though i kinda feel sad that that wallet's spoilt (it IS nice, u know). just as well i hadn't bought it one year ago, or i would have been kicking myself now, as there was 30% off the wallets at Fossil, so the price of the wallet fell from $25 to $17.50 (i think). it was the same for several other things i bought, like the top i bought from DCP (it was 50% off), the 37 degrees pencil case (20% off i think), and the book "Blink" by Malcolm Gladwell (20% off). wow! cool, ain't it? however, tops are not exactly what i need right now. rather, what i need is bottoms. yes!! but bottoms are so ex! hmm. i'm going out again with lun later to look for bottoms. let's hope i don't get sidetracked by other tops. which reminds me, i want to get the tops from U2!!

after the euphoria of shopping and a plentiful harvest has died down, i now feel a pain on my body. u know, the parts of the body that have connected with pockets? yah... spent so much yesterday that a BIG hole has been burnt in my pocket. the hole has burnt THROUGH the cloth to connect with my skin. to quote someone's blog (i just happened to stumble across it one day), the cloth that's the pocket is "a limp rag by now". haha. hmm, but this hasn't seemed to stop my shopping urges. oh man. what am i going to do?! it's like a drug! help!!! can't seem to stop wanting to spend more money. ok, after going shopping today, i shall TRY not to spend more money.

Day Before (3rd July)
we went to East Coast Beach to cycle! so fun! we rented 2 bikes, both tandems, so 4 of us could cycle together. wow, the beach was CROWDED, and the bike tracks to and fro were packed with people. and some people- cyclists, pedestrians, rollerbladers- could actually be insensitive enough to stop in the middle of the road. SUDDENLY stop some more! can you believe that?! it was so irritating! i mean, what if we had suddenly knocked into them? whose fault would that be now? and some, like the rollerbladers, were rollerblading so sloooooowly! fine, so they were beginners, but they could at least have tried to move to the sides when we rang our bells couldn't they? hey, i would understand if they were ALONE and they were BEGINNERS, but they had EXPERIENCED PARTNERS with them ok?! but noooooooooo the experienced partners couldn't give a hoot about us. argh. other than that, the trip to the beach was fun. =) we cycled till our butts were numb. haha, i guess that was so 'cause the seats were hard.... or maybe it was 'cause we haven been cycling for a long time? or *GASP!* our butts have grown enormously bigger?!??!?!!? *faints* haha... =)

The Day Before The Day Before (2nd July)
we went to the zoo! yep, i know it sounds kinda lame that i should feel so happy over a trip to the zoo, but it's been so many years since we went to the zoo that I've lost count. haha... =) anyway, my father couldn't make it that day as he had to work, so the 4 of us went instead. hehe, no car this time, so we went by public transport. we have a straight bus to choa chu kand interchange, so we made use of that instead of the mrt, 'cause my mother wanted to see the "change in surroundings as we move from east to west". yah... interesting idea rite? =) so take the bus we did, and oh man, my butt had lost all feeling by the time we reached cck interchange. haha, but it was an unforgettable trip. imagine travelling all the way from bedok to cck by bus! omg! oh, for the record, the bus trip was 1 1/2 hours long.

ok, so we reached the zoo at 12 something, and we started walking around after buying the tickets (it was so expensive! there was no student discount at all ok! $56 altogether!). we walked for 4-5 hours- man! that was one BIG exercise, all thanks to TAY YI FANG the slavedriver!! just when lun, my mother and i were about to throw in the towel and the white flag, she announced, "We haven't seen the white tigers! and the tapirs! and the (oh my goodness) baboons! Let's go see them!" my goodness, i almost fainted then and there. haha, no lar, it wasn't that serious, but I was amazed at her stamina. haha, the baboons were one interesting exhibit actually. each male baboon has a harem, and wherever the male goes, the harem goes. the male can 'kidnap' a young female and make her part of his harem when she comes of age. when baboons are in heat, their butts turn REALLY RED !! come to think of it, i think it was mating season for the animals. wherever we went, we saw animals mating- primates, ostriches, horses etc. yah, so going there that day was.... educational.

we were so tired by the time we finished walking around the zoo that we slept the trip back to cck interchange (the bus ride from mandai to cck wasn't that long actually- about 15 minutes maybe?), and i even dreamt! imagine how tired we were. haha. we took the bus back again!! heh. but the IRRITATING thing is, I COULDN GET TO SLEEP ON THE TRIP BACK! not that there weren't seats on the bus, but i just COULDN'T enter dreamland. how irritating is that?! my eyes were tired, sure, but my mind just wouldn't shut. argh.

the zoo has really changed alot since the last time i visited it. the entrance itself is rather grand, with introductions to the various tribes in the world. the whole setting is rather like africa, and with the sound of drums being played by the young visitors (the children i mean), u somehow get a feeling that you are supposed to be in africa (well the drumming was amateurish, but worth encouraging..... ;) ), and i like the fact that they build 'shelters' for almost all the enclosures- u know, the ones like the polar bear exhibits? so now instead of just seeing the tops of the hippos, we can actually see how they swim etc! hmm, and i also particularly like the way they insert information about the various tribes found around the world like africa, ethiopa etc, and even show us bits of their culture, living habits and so on. oh yes, and how could i forget ben and jerry's? it's at the entrance to the zoo. the flavours have such interesting names! like chunky monkey, and..... hmm... there are too many to remember. much as I would have loved to, i didn't buy a cone, mainly because i was too lazy to dig out my money, and also partly because i thought the bus would be coming anytime. so the next time i go, i MUST remember to patronize ben and jerry's. any recommendations anyone? =)

Of Work and Wedding Dinners

it's my last day of work today, and i feel kinda sad that i'm gonna leave this place after 6 mths of working here. nonetheless, i'm oso counting down the time till i can leave then i can have FREEDOM!! not that there hasn been much freedom the last 6 mths or so, but now, there's gonna be an endless (well, almost) amt of freedom! yay! hopefully in these 2-3 wks i'll be able to slp late, wake up late, do watever i want, slack, and just wear crummy but comfortable clothes instead of thinking bout what to wear to work the next day. oh, not forgetting the food, of course. gone will be the days when i agonise over what to eat for lunch, and in its place will be glorious food by none other than mira!!! yay!! hmm, but this is for a limited period of 3 wks only b4 sch starts and i'll be moving to the hostel!! =( tt's quite sad.... eatng outside food all the time... oh man, i can just imagine the feeling of the fats running through my veins, to my brain, to my heart.... AHHHHHHH!!! ok.

ooh i made strawberries dipped in chocolate for my colleagues as my 'goodbye gift'. haha, i'd love to show the photos here, but thing is, we cant find the cable to connect the digicam to the computer, so i can neither show u the top i collected, nor the strawberries i did. a beautiful sight they were too, all red and fresh. just tt they were on the sour side. hmmmmm but they go well with chocolate. here's a tip: DONT use baking chocolate to do it. i didn know there are other kinds of cooking chocolate being sold on the market! i just happily assumed baking chocolate's the one for me and just bought it. imagine the horror and panic when i found out the chocolates didn melt into liquid but instead into a thick cream. not tt it isn nice, but it was MUCH harder to coat the strawberries with it.

i'm acually leaving the office earlier than 6 today. it just depends on what time, 'cause shirley and jes are planning to claim time off from their work. they are now trying to rush through their verification of our work and start packing. wish i could help them, but they refuse any help. oooo i hope i don't eat too fully; i'm attending my father's cousin's wedding tonight, and i need to ensure sufficient space in my stomach. =)

to those who thought i was supposed to go out with von and lun today: yah, we were supposed to go out together after my work today. unfortunately, my parents decided to bring one of us along for the wedding dinner to take my grandmother's place, so by some reason or other i was chosen to go. i still don't really know how i got chosen. i think it was assumed by everyone that i would be the one going, which is confusing, really, because in the family, i'm the one who's known for her lousy appetite. where is the logic for me to attend the wedding dinner and waste the food there, right?

anyway, i'm not (exactly) complaining bout it. i don't really mind going. after all, i want to try the food at Grand Copthorne. except for the sharks' fin though. i have never understood why Chinese like to eat it so much. it's not as if sharks' fin will improve one's health or beauty or wealth, and it's not as if there is any taste. it's only that it's expensive that makes it the reason for its exclusivity. that, and the fact that it's hard to capture sharks (?) and that it's against the law (is it? if it isn, it should be). anyway, i digress. i DO NOT like sharks' fin, reason being the way the sharks are captured for their fins is just simply too cruel. i mean, if they want the fins, they might as well kill the whole shark. WHAT IS THE POINT IN CUTTING OFF ITS FINS AND THROWING IT BACK INTO THE OCEAN/SEA TO LET IT DIE?! it's going to die ANYWAY, so why not just give it a quicker death? argh. the cruelty some humans can get up to. IF (that's a damn big IF) i get married next time, i'll make sure i don't serve sharks' fin. i'll serve some other thing. i'm sure there are other kinds of soup that can make up for it in this wide world.

for those who have been sharp to notice that i seem to be avoiding cyber language/sms language in this entry, welcome, and thank you. haha, it shows u had enough patience to read this entire entry, and i'm honoured. =) yah, i AM trying to avoid using the language i've been using all along, like "wat", "tokking" etc, 'cause von and lun have been saying that it spoils the whole entry. they said like, just when they have begun to get into the rhythm of reading my entry, out pops a "tokking", which completely spoils the seriousness or mood of the entry. i agree entirely, but it's become such an ingrown habit in me over the past year that i have to take time to slowly get rid of it. haha, i have to make a conscious effort not to slip in any "wat(s)", and spell the words correctly. the change will be slow, but hopefully in the end there WILL be a change, and not something given up halfway.

i've got alot more to write, but i think this entry is getting WAAAAAY too long already, so i shall stop. i shall update......... soon. i hope. with whatever else i was thinking of writing.

damn! i always seem to spoil a good ending for an entry. it was supposed to end at "i hope", but it didn't. anyway, it ends here. now. just let me pry my hands off the keyboard.............................

Deep, Dark Secrets of His and Her Brains

haha, be sure and go read this article; it suggests that the differing behaviours of men and women acty lie in the differing structures of their brains.

1 particular quote from the article: "Women's brains, for instance, seem to be faster and more efficient than men's." perhaps this explains the general conception that women are better able to multi-task than men?

another quote: "All in all, men appear to have more gray matter, made up of active neurons, and women more of the white matter responsible for communication between different areas of the brain."

and another: "Overall, women's brains seem to be more complexly corrugated, suggesting that more complicated neural structures lie within, researchers at UCLA found in August."

oh yes, the size of each gender's brain doesn affect the intelligence level of each gender (as in, the brain size of men and women), cos though men's brains are generally larger than women's, women have 12% more neurons than men do, which means that females are so NOT any stupider than males. so there. those old stick in the muds who prefer males to females and think that males are superior to females can just think about that.

i haven finished reading this article, but it's been interesting so far. do u think discrimination will reach new heights again when concrete evidence is found that the brain structures of each person defines a certain characteristic that he/she has?

Peke

here's a picture of peke, for those who've nvr seen him before... =) or u can go to my yahoo photo album to see him too! =)

Bidding

hurul, NOW i know where the fun is in bidding on internet auction sites. it IS fun! =)

oh man... haha i think something got into me yesterday, possessing me to bid on this pink billabong top which was selling for $35. i BID for it! it was only after i had happily put down my offer that the truth sank in. i was making a commitment to buy it. after tt was a jumble of mixed emotions. though there was tt sense of euphoria at having acquired something i like, there was the consequence of $35 less from my wallet, and the fact that the price i paid for it is bout the same as that sold in shops. there is one consolation though: i haven seen this design in singapore. i dunno if that is supposed to be one great consolation, but at least there's one bright spot. =) i'm going to meet the seller later to claim it, and maybe i'll put the picture up. just dun come knocking my head coz the top doesn look worth $35 k? and while the fact that i'm going to lay my hands on my first purchase, i've gone and bid on another thing- a book. yah, u read that rite. a book. it's "The Piano Tuner" by Daniel Mason. it looks like a good book. remember someone (was it hurul or xuefang?) read it in the sch library last yr, and said it was quite good. anyway, b4 u can slap ur forehead in exasperation, the book was going at $2. haha, u read that rite too. =) there was the "Princess Diaries" book by Meg Cabot, and it was going for $0.59. oooh yes, i can sure see the fun in bidding and visiting aution sites. *vigorous nod*

now, if i could just get my itchy fingers off the bidding button.......

oh, just to sidetrack a little, do u like my new blogskin? i love this design!! =)

had a nice dinner last night with maternal relatives. the dinner was courtesy of alvin and alan's father, who gave us the treat, so THANK YOU jiu jiu! =) haha though the table was too large for everyone to converse properly, those in the same generations were able to converse, coz we were all seated according to generation. ( ok this is v hard to describe, so try to bear with me). anyway, the location was at this seafood restaurant called "Red House Restaurant", which is at East Coast beach. with wonderful company, and wonderful food, we lacked nothing to make the night wonderful. conversation btw the adults flowed as freely as wine does at a banquet, but for the younger generation (us), i think it was a little awkward... hee... perhaps alvin and alan felt a little left out coz it was mostly girls there...? dunno... but they were rather quiet. =) (to alvin and alan: i meant no offense!) ok anyway, it was nice to see everyone gathered together round a table, talking and laughing. it's even better than CNY acty, where though everyone was gathered in the house, there were cliques evident, thus reducing the chances of relatives and family catching up with everyone else. so i guess the scientific theory about round objects being better able to distribute heat properly applies to interaction btw ppl as well? (well the theory is vague to me now, coz i think tt's a p6 memory, so update me if i'm wrong k?)

after the dinner, everyone took a stroll along the beach, and we stopped in front of the waves in the middle of the road and started tokking again. well, the adults started it first, so we followed suit. talk soon turned towards the trip to song, sarawak at the end of the yr, when we would be going back to celebrate my maternal grandma's 80th birthday. so exciting! perhaps the WHOLE family will be reunited again? well, that's provided kenette, lynette jiejie etc can make it back to song as well, and that alvin, alan etc are coming too. haha, cant wait. initially, we thot there might be a reunion at ah bin kor kor's wedding, but alas! lynette jiejie has an exam on the day of his wedding. hai....

laura has agreed to take us around sibu to shop! haha, according to her, clothes are rather cheap there, but well... while i'm looking forward to it, i'm kinda hesitant as well, coz well.... sibu isn really known for being a shopping paradise, is it? hmm we should all make a date to go wild wild wet during the dec hols oso, yes?

looking forward to end of this week, when i'll be going out with von and lun again! i so need to get a wallet, coz mine's spoilt. it's literally disintegrating. everytime i hold it in my hands, there are black colour bits of the wallet sticking to my palm. eugh!

ok i gtg back to reading up on psychology. better buck up this time, if i wanna make something of my life.... but i'm hungry! i'm always hungry these days.

oh yes, bernice jie jie is coming back today. haha, so if u're reading this entry, bernice jie jie, welcome back! =)

i love the song whose lyrics i just posted below. i know it's kinda late to post a tribute for Fathers' Day, esp since i already posted an entry after Fathers' Day. hee...

anyway, i think this song epitomises wat our fathers do for us. not all the lyrics apply of cos, but listening to the song just so reminded me of wat my father had/has done for me all this while, and when i first heard the song and thot bout those things, i just cried. haha, call it hormones or watever, but whenever i think back on the lyrics, i get all teary. =p weird rite?

anyway, though there's only a small chance that my father will chance upon this entry, i'll just like to say, 'Thank you, Pa, for all that u have done for me this past 19 yrs. love u LOTS!" =)

oh man. i'm starting to tear up again. -_-"

Daddy's Hands

I remember daddy's hands folded silently in prayer
And reachin' out to hold me, when I had a nightmare
You could read quite a story in the callous' and lines
Years of work and worry had left their mark behind

I remember daddy's hands how they held my mama tight
And patted my back for something done right
There are things that I'd forgotten that I loved about the man
But I'll always remember the love in daddy's hands...

Chorus:
Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin'
Daddy's hands were hard as steel when I'd done wrong
Daddy's hands weren't always gentle but I've come to understand
There was always love in daddy's hands.

I remember daddy's hands workin' 'til they bled
Sacrificed unselfishly just to keep us all fed
If I could do things over, I'd live my life again
And never take for granted the love in daddy's hands

(Chorus)
Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin'
Daddy's hands were hard as steel when I'd done wrong
Daddy's hands weren't always gentle but I've come to understand
There was always love in daddy's hands.

(Repeat Chorus)
Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin'
Daddy's hands were hard as steel when I'd done wrong
Daddy's hands weren't always gentle but I've come to understand T
here was always love in daddy's hands.

---- Holly Dunn

random ramblings

i'm now using the company's comp to blog. again. haha... i've finished keying in my orders already, if tt's wat u're wondering... okok, i'll admit, i did surf the net while keying in orders, BUT that was done coz i was trying to drag doing it. there was too little to do. hehe, and if i finished earlier, there wouldn be anything else to do u see.... =)

boring boring.

i thot of a topic i wanted to blog about just now while doing my data entry. unfortunately, it slipped my mind.

hmm... i have to change my layout. i want to design my own!! but i dunno how to do it. i dun even know how some ppl manage to get adobe photoshop. do they buy it? or do they download it? if they download it, how?!?!?! i cant seem to be able to dl it..... it keeps getting into that stupid winrar prog that unzips everything into its small components, and i DUN understand a single thing.

i wanna go shopping again!! i have this nasty feeling that i've spent WAAAAY over my budget already, and the amt of money in my bank account is dwindling. a signal to me to curb my spending. unfortunately, i cant curb the urge. the urge to go out buy something to make me feel satisfied and happy. that feeling of euphoria. that jolt of adrenaline that courses thru my veins with a purchase that i love and have lusted for a loooong time. that jolt of excitement and pleasure at finally making something that u like yours. that.... well, u get the meaning. =) it's an addiction, shopping. i can never have enough bottoms, tops, bags.... others might think they are more than enough, but.... somehow, wouldn u get sick of wearing the same things over and over again? the thrill dies off after while, rite? hmm... if i could just get some money to go shopping again... to buy clothes for uni...? after all, since i'm gonna stay at the hostel, i'll be taking quite a few clothes, and i oso have to leave some for lun, rite? ;) oh, and i need a wallet. my current one is falling to pieces. i wonder if Fossil still has that wallet i saw last yr....?

Joey

HAHA! "Joey" (the sitcom) is hilarious. hehe i cant decide if he's dumb or if he's just plain innocent and naive. while he might seem stupid in the show with his silly antics and his speech, wat he says makes sense sometimes, and is often wat we dun see until he points it out. well, at least I dun see it until he points it out. or is watever he says just his observation from a totally innocent point of view? i cant decide.

i mean, sometimes, ppl whom we might deem to be not insightful coz of their mental ability - children, autistic children etc- might sometimes make statements which surprise us, and make us realise, "yah, why didn i ever think of that?" or even realise that we have been making mountains out of molehills all along, when things were really that simple. some ppl say humans complicate lives, and i couldn agree more. when some children meet strangers, they hold nothing back, pouring out watever they think; but adults? its more often than not that they might think that they have to put up a front to perhaps impress strangers, and mebbe even complicate the whole thing, by thinking "shit. i just told him wat my parents do. would he think i'm rich/boastful for saying that?" (u know, those kind of things?). whereas children on the other hand, nvr think twice bout wat they say. wat they say is wat they feel. period. so why complicate things?

i cant say that i dun think too much bout the actions and statements of those around me, but sometimes i think that it's just so tiring to keep trying to second-guess wat the other person is trying to say or do. wat if that action was really done innocently or unconsciously? wouldn i be making a stupid fool out of myself for wasting so much energy trying to decipher wat he/she meant? but sometimes, i feel that this is easier said than done, and i guess it takes alot of self-confidence to assure urself that wat the other person said was unintentional, and had no double meaning watsoever.

hmm. or issit just me?

PS: sheesh! this entry was supposed to be gushing about "Joey". now it has turned into some kind of philosophical piece. -_-" haha, forgive me for spoiling the mood. =) (ok and now i've gone and done it again....)

i ABSOLUTELY hate filling in forms. idiotic stupid unnecessary things. how many times have i filled in my cca participation? tell me!! and now they want it AGAIN?! i mean, dun schools update their database? and besides, if nus has ALL the details of our lives, surely ntu has them too? wat for ask us how many siblings including deceased ones we have? its not like they'll let them in just because they have siblings in the uni, rite? argh.

and why the hell are there so many different dates? i'm getting all confused now just thinking of which form i have to hand in next. and when do i have to make payment for the hostels? everything is happening so fast its like there's barely time to acty make sense of it. i did make a list of when to hand in wat, but i still have tt nagging feeling that that's not all there is. sheesh.

Denise Keller chose "Volfgang" (Wolfgang, acty... it's how she pronounces his name. haha... )!! oh man!! poor howard looked sooooo crushed when she broke her decision to him. he looked like he didn know wat to do, and in the end he just took the first step to hug denise, and wished her all the best and to have fun in europe with wolfgang. AWWWWWWWW...

but while i had wished for howard to win the fair Denise's heart, i have to admit they didn look as nice as denise does with wolfgang and to be honest, i htink wolfgang suits her. still.........

Congratulations Tay Yi Ling, you are...

Scarlett Ting of joewei.blogspot.com

You are independent, smart and beautiful. Its too bad you don't see that yourself because life's little difficulties brought down a lot of your self confidence. As a result, you talk cryptic and you don't trust people easily. You care a lot for your friends and your loved ones, sometimes even more than you care for yourself, although they don't always seem to appreciate it. Don't let that affect you. As the saying goes, you don't miss the water till the well runs dry. So hang in there, you're a star in the making.

Which Singaporean Blogger Are You?

Work

working now, and wishing i was home. haha, yah yah i know... its bad work attitude, but well, how else can i feel when my whole family is going shopping later in the afternoon, and then going to JB for satay (dun ask me y they go to JB just to eat satay. i'm puzzled too) ? i wanna go too!!!! perhaps one advantage of not going with them is tt i'll be able to earn more money perhaps? but well, at the moment all i can think of is going out. haha... the thot of going out far outweighs the thot of money entering my bank account at the moment. =p

with the end of my working experience drawing nearer everyday (end of this month, which is 2 more weeks), i'm starting to have bittersweet emotions. when i started work at the beginning of the yr, i nvr expected to work this long, nor feel such an attachment to my fellow colleagues. while the thot of going to work (waking up early esp during the hols when everyone is still aslp) is rather irritating, seeing my colleagues does add a little sweetener to work. at least working doesn turn out so boring, coz we can talk, joke, etc in this little room of ours. so while i'm happy that my working experience is coming to an end (i can finally wake up late yay!!!), i feel a little sad that i'd have to part with these colleagues. i know i've blogged bout them b4, so i shall not bore u with the details. suffice it to say that they have made my 6 mths of work in Spring more than pleasant, and a little less afraid of wat to expect next time i come out to work. =)

i think whether one enjoys one's work really depends largely on the type of colleagues/team one has at work. otherwise, how is one expected to perform well at work if one is constantly facing strangers or, worse, ppl who dun like him/her? going to work would soon become a chore and soon, there would be a lack of motivation to work. hmm. so there would be a loss in productivity, and... well, u know wat will happen, being smart econs students u are. =)

unfortunately, though i had a rather pleasant time working at Spring, i think i'm not experiencing the full aspect of a working life.

1. i dun have any responsibilities, nor any leadership role to play. so it means little or no burden on me and i can sleep easy at nite. no responsibilities oso mean i can turn up for work and leave anytime i want. not tt i do that, mind u. i was merely listing out the reasons why i htink i might not be experiencing the full aspect of a working life. on the other hand, the full-time workers have to deal with difficult customers, worry about when the next shipment is arriving, or bout when the clients will withdraw their projects etc.

2. i'm working as a data entry worker. on top of that, i'm always enclosed inside a room, where i'm working with the same 3 other ppl. chances of meeting other ppl outside the dept or in the other parts of the company are slim. add to the fact tt i'm a temp, and the chances of me interacting with those who have nothing to do with our dept gets slimmer. thus, the commonly lamented office politics will hardly be experienced by me. well, i did experience it once in the beginning of my stint here, but i htink tt's chicken feed compared with wat others experience in larger companies or even in the bigger depts of this company.

3. i'm a temp, so no one pays any mind to me, and thus i dun get involved in office politics. not tt i wanna get involved in it, but well, we all know office politics are part and parcel of one's working life.

4. i'm still young (relatively to the other staff in the company), so the adults usually take care of me like i'm still this little girl. therefore, not much or nothing is held against me when i say or do somethign tt might sound a mite childish. =)

5. one company doesn represent all of them.

ok. i think all the reasons have to do with the fact that i'm a temp and my age, but u get the picture. =)

now tt i've finished keying in all the order entries, guess i'll surf the net to while away the time... yah, and get fat while sitting down. -_-"

INFATUATED

OOOOOOO i'm looking at Vic Zhou AKA Zai Zai's photos now. *drools*

haha... excuse me while i'm flooding my keyboard with you-know-wat. haha, he's soooooo cute!! his eyes can give out electricity man. when i was watching Mars, wow, the more i looked at him, the more i wished the show would go on forever. haha, i can just sit in front of the tv looking at him. he looks great from all sides, with all expressions. oooooh!

haha, i guess i'm sounding v disgusting right now, going goo-goo ga-ga over an idol... but wow, have u seen his smile? ;)

You Are a Life Blogger!

Your blog is the story of your life - a living diary.If it happens, you blog it. And make it as entertaining as possible.

What kind of blogger are you?

What A Girl Wants?

watched Eye For A Guy 2 last night. it was season finale part 1, where the last 2 guys remaining each got to spend a full day with Denise Keller (DK) and make one last attempt to win her heart. i must say, wat each of them did was great and very daring. each put their hearts and prides on the line, and planned 2 wonderful days to spend with her. wat each did was bound to make any girl get swept off her feet. howard brought DK to the carnival, where they had a portrait done together oso, of howard carrying DK, and the 2 of them in swimming suits. then they went on to dinner where he presented her with a fairy tale with her as the main character. it was a fairy tale written in poetry form to boot! then, they went back to the carnival, and started dancing in the moonlight- after he had kissed her. the whole scene was so wonderfully romantic. any girl was bound to feel as if she's the world's luckiest girl if she was in DK's shoes. =) the scenes of howard and DK were so sweet!! haha, it made me wanna support him in winning over DK. i mean, he always manages to think of ways to get her to notice him, and make her laugh. the things he does are not extravagant, but it did convince me that watever he did for her was done with her in mind, solely her. the video in the last episode wasn fantastically made with special effects etc, but they just captured his sincerity. his gestures strike me as innocent, with the sole intent on making DK happy. yep.

wolfgang... he's suave, charismatic, and the perfect gentleman in the sense that he knows the proper things to say or do. he impressed me when he managed to handle the situation regarding the "Little Red Box" pretty well. while all the other guys were disturbing him bout it, he was just calmly handling it. he impressed DK's friends, particularly her female friend, who asked pretty direct qns and was rather... well, a little on the catty side. he just calmly answered all her qns, and there seemed to be no pretences put on when he answered the qns. it seemed like he had nothing to hide. well, tts wat i could see on tv. i wouldn know in real life =) after all, the way they lead their lives is more than the 1/2 hour we see weekly on Ch 5 rite? wolfgang is smooth and confident in his pursuit of DK, and thing is, he's confident in every situation he's put into, and tt is a trait that would impress girls, since it brings a sense of security, isn it?

yep, so there u have it. 2 guys with 2 different wooing tactics. which would u go for? the one who makes u feel like u are the centre of his universe and goes all out to make u feel treasured thru gestures which are not necessarily extravagant? or the one who's worldly, confident, and sophisticated?

haha, if u ask me, a mix would be nice, but how many ppl are there who are like tt? after all, which girl wouldn like to be wined and dined? on the other hand, which girl wouldn like to receive gestures that are so sweet and sincere? not to say tt wining and dining doesn show sincerity, but someitmes, sincerity is not necessarily shown thru the amt of money one spends, rite?

think bout it.

We are what we eat, wear, read

found this article that was linked to one of the blogs i was surfing. aint it true to the title of today's entry?

Love thy stuff

Consumer identity is shaped by love of objects

How does the saying go? Love what you drive, don't drive what you love? The premise is that a sturdy, reliable car is a more prudent purchase than a flashy, speedy car. Whether practical or not, an article in the June 2005 issue of the Journal of Consumer Research reveals that love of one's possessions can play an exceptionally important role in a person's identity.

"Consider the vast number of objects and consumption activities that come and go in our lives; groceries, hobbies, vacations, clothing, clubs, gifts, tools, cars, movies, investments, computers, newspapers, art, books, furniture," argues Aaron Ahuvia (University of Michigan). "From this vast sea only a handful are loved. It is not surprising then that these few loved objects and activities play a special role in consumers' understandings of who they are as people."

Ahuvia's research explores how consumers construct their perceptions of who they are. In creating a narrative of self, possessions play an essential role.

"The people and things we love have a strong influence on our sense of who we are," explains Ahuvia. "This article investigates the possessions and activities that consumers love, and their role in the construction of a coherent identity narrative."

In today's world of consumerism, notes Ahuvia, it's impossible for a person's relationship with objects--some of which they love--to not impact who they are and who they want to be.

"Sometimes love-objects assist with symbolically demarcating the boundary between the self and identities that the consumer rejects. In other instances love-objects help to symbolically support an identity which combines potentially conflicting aspects of self--such as tensions between the consumer's past identity versus the person they want to become, or the conflicts between ideals of who the consumer should be, which are advocated by socializing agents."

yesterday, today, and.... mebbe tomorrow

we took half day off yesterday, the whole data entry dept. crystal didn go for work, so we met her at orchard. haha, we meant to have lunch at Crystal Jade, but in the end we ended up at coffee club in takashimaya. ooohhhhh!! the tiramisu al cafe is glorious!! i was in heaven during the 15 minutes i savoured the cake. i'm salivating rite now. oh man....... *desktop is flooded with saliva* (okok i know i'm disgusting)

it was so fun going out with jes, shirley and crystal. we went to the different boutiques in taka- LV, burberrys, gucci etc. it was my first time going into such boutiques, and well, it was a nice experience. haha, dun say i've nvr been there lar. anyway, the stuff there are soooo expensive! goodness, one LV watch costs above $2000, and there was one tt cost $22 000 +++!! *whistles* thing is, it was CROWDED in LV k... i suppose there was a sale on, but to be honest, it didn seem like one to me. or maybe i'm too suaku lar. haha... jes was looking for a key pouch cum coin purse for her bf, so tts the reason y we were in those boutiques. wow, we really walked the whole of taka k... and i wore the wrong footwear. -_-" i was wearing slippers. oh man. if i had known we were gonna walk so much, i would have worn sports shoes. hahahahaa... oooh and i almost bought 2 pairs of slippers at charles and keith, but i had to think twice bout it coz i wasn v sure if i have the clothes to match it and if i would wear it often. oh yes, not forgetting the price. i'm STILL waiting to go thailand or some other shopping paradise to shop. i think singapore's gss doesn seem like much of a sale leh.... nonetheless, i still feel like going. contradictory, arent i?

lun's at her Leo Camp today, and it'll last till tml. hai... much as i hate to admit it coz her head will inflate so much tt we will have to move into an airplane hangar, i'll miss her, coz there wun be anyone to tok to me!!!!!! hai... oh yes, and while she was packing last night, i found a good excuse for shopping- we need a toiletries bag. yes, we do. haha, lame reason though it seems, it's a good enough reason to get my adrenaline coursing thru my veins. or issit the caffeine tts running thru my veins now? anyways, i'm on a high now.

wat should i eat for lunch today? just had burger king for breakfast, and thus have no appetite for lunch. nothing stirs my palate now, coz i'm soooooooo full! the thot of food now turns my stomach a little.

thank god it's friday today man... i'm falling asleep at my desk already, but unfortunately i still have to drum up enthusiasm to go help CS outside. they're overloaded with work theses days, and thus need our help. unfortunately, though i'm in data entry dept and it was agreed that we would help with data entry should CS need it, i'll have to do the Undels later. oh, Undels are the undeliverables. bleah. its a simple task lar, but boring and tedious. oh yah, and it takes up alot of space.

tml.... i hope to go out, but i think its unlikely, coz von has to study, my father is going to work, and my mother...... hm i think she;s working oso. so i'm like the free-est person in the house. oops. i htink i'm gonna have to bathe schnoozee. it sounds easy, but do u know wat it entails? carrying him into the toilet where he will act as if i'm gonna slaughter him or try to drown him with a shower head, and then fighting with me over the towel which is supposed to be used to dry him, and then struggle as i carry him to the common area to let him dry in the sun, and there he will fight for the towel with me again and run around like a mad dog. there i will be, sweaty and wet and smelly. wow. okok, to be fair, he's a cute li'l guy. when he's being bathed, he'll look at u with those innocent blue-black eyes and his fringe falling in his face, which just melts ur heart i tell u.... he'll look at u, as if saying, "ok, u got wat u wanted, i have to trust u now, but pls drown me with as much compassion as u can muster." yah... and after tt, when he's drier, he'll run downstairs to look for his beloved evon, leaving me- the one who bathed him and suffered his scratches- to clear up the mess he made upstairs. tok about gratitude. tsk tsk. nonetheless, i still love him. ;)

ok. this is a boring entry and i sound bitchy. shoot me someone!!

going to slp. bye.

Shoulda Woulda Coulda

People say that together we were both sides of the same coin
That we would shine like Venus in a clear night sky
We thought our love could overcome the circumstances
But my ambition wouldn't allow for compromise

I could see in the distance all the dreams that were clear to me
Every choice that I had to make left you on your own
Somehow the road we started down had split asunder
Too late to realise how far apart we'd grown.
How I wish I, wish I'd done a little bit more

Now "Shoulda woulda coulda", means I'm out of time
Coz "Shoulda woulda coulda", can't change your mind
And I wonder, wonder, wonder what I'm gonna do
"Shoulda woulda coulda" are the last words of a fool

People ask how it feels to live the kind of life others dream about
I tell them everybody gotta face their highs and their lows
And in my life there's a love I put aside, cause I was busy loving something else
So for every little thing you hold on to, you've got to let something else go

Fool if I would now forsake the opportunities are fate
I know I'm right where I belong
But sometimes when I'm not so strong I..

Now "Shoulda woulda coulda", means I'm out of time
Coz "Shoulda woulda coulda", can't change your mind
And I wonder, wonder, wonder what I'm gonna do
"Shoulda woulda coulda" are the last words of a fool

Now "Shoulda woulda coulda", means I'm out of time
Coz "Shoulda woulda coulda", can't change your mind
And I wonder, wonder, wonder what I'm gonna do
"Shoulda woulda coulda" are the last words of a fool...

Beverly Knight

Memories

smells can trigger lots of memories. just today, the smell of the perfume i'm wearing now brings back many memories; in particular, memories of year 1. haha... i guess tt's coz i wore this scent when i was in yr 1. =) memories of lit classes, econ lectures (of all things) and TP were the clearest memories. as i keyed order entries at work, images of when i was in yr 1 kept drifting idly into my mind. weird... haven thot bout yr 1 for quite awhile, esp bout econ lectures, and now, i feel like i'm back in tt time, mugging and doing essay outlines for miss wee, and rushing thru the lit logbooks just before lit lesson, particularly reynolds'. images of the 'mini-gathering' in the canteen before flag raising oso appeared in my mind- mel, her cj, TP... and esp the time before the yr 2s' physics prelims. haha, TP's classmates were crowding around asking him qns. i remember feeling damn extra down there at that time. haha... everyone tokking bout physics, and there i was, doing a hist essay outline. -_-" how different can tt be?

which brings back doubts and uncertainties regarding things done in the past. could i have done tt better? wat would have happened if i had done this? wat would have happened if i had done otherwise? would the result have been any different from now? is tt the beauty of memories? the imperfection of it, tt makes it all the more real and treasured and the most thot about? after all, the fact tt we are unable to amend anything tt happend in the past probably makes us feel helpless, and we thus keep thinking back on it and wondering. perhaps its thus treasured, coz we cant bear to tear ourselves away from thinking wat could be done, wat shouldn have been done in the memory, and thus arent able to let go of it? perhaps some ppl can acty let go of the past and not look back, but come on, have they NEVER thot back to their past and viewed some memories with regret, and some with joy? or issit that they CHOOSE not to think bout them, and stuff the memories into a box in their brains marked "PAST: DO NOT OPEN"? or do they just forget bout it? or does it just occur naturally?

i know we have to learn to let go of the past, but does letting go mean forgetting?

do optimistic ppl find it better to let go?

Messing Around

i'm soooooo sleepy now!! yawn~~~ still at spring, where we have FINALLY finished keying in the orders. i cant imagine if i had to key ALL the entries today. think i'll just die. haha... crystal and shirley are supposed to do order testing from yesterday to tml, so since jes is on leave, i have to be the only one to cover the order entries. unfortunately, the new system is faulty today, so order testings cant be done after all, so... i had help today! much as i would like to try finishing the orders by myself, the sad truth is that i'm unable to do so. *sob sob* i tried doing so yesterday, and ended up almost killing myself. oh man!!

next news. i'm gonna extend my work at spring till the end of june. wow. its extended by another 2 weeks. i agreed partly coz of the extra money i'd be able to earn, and oso coz they;re short of staff here. goodness knows wat the hr dept is doing. they haven found a new worker yet. i feel quite sad bout not being able to leave earlier though, coz there goes 2 weeks of my potential hol!!! *sniff sniff* ah well... hopefully the money will more than make up for it.

i'm so bored at the office now. i think u can tell it from the contents of this blog. totally random and without any emotion. haha. bye.