WOW! I went down to the reservoir to watch the Wakeboarding Championships yesterday. COOL! The stunts the competitors executed were nothing short of spectacular. There were triple somersaults executed by the champion- Philip (something.. think it was Goldberg), glides on some thin platform. Wonderful. Watching them wakeboarding gave me a sudden urge to go learn it too. But like Yi Lun said, the most we can hope to do is to hold on to the rope. At the very most we could hope to move and change directions. To hope to be able to somersault and land on my feet would be too much to ask for. I hope the C'ships will be held at Bedok Reservoir again next year!! =)
The performance by the Stars from Florida were spectacular too. There was ballet on the skis, acrobatic stunts where the guy held the woman aloft and she balanced on his shoulders, or he used one hand to support her while she moved gracefully, and there was this 4-man thing where all of them somersaulted off the ramp at the same time.. helicopter jumps... WHOA! FANTASTIC! It was a real eye-opener... =)
Maybe I might consider taking it up... One day.... Anyone got any lobangs? ;)
Monday, October 24, 2005
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Wakeboarding Championships is here again!
It's the Wakeboarding Championships again! It's being held at Bedok Reservoir, just directly in front of my house. I have a vantage view of the reservoir from my living room and my parents' room, but, oh, how sad that I can't stand there for extended periods of time to watch the competition. Come to think of it, it was the same thing last year. It was around the same time, but it was the time when I had to prepare for As. So.. yah, it's self-explanatory, isn't it?
Anyway, wakeboarding looks quite cool. All the somersaulting on the water. It's a l'il like water-skiiing, but more extreme, isn't it? Cool. I suppose these competitors are the best their countries have to offer, and it's quite heartbreaking to see them executing their amazing somersaults and other stunts only to land on their backs in the water and having to restart it all over again. But then again, in competitions, I suppose one has to get used to failures and losing and having the courage to start all over again. They have to have strong determination to learn from their mistakes and simultaneously forget what happened the last time and compete once again. Amazing.
I think athletes are quite remarkable people. Not only do they have to keep their bodies in top shape, they have to keep themselves mentally alert and fit as well, and condition themselves to forget about the audience or ignore the pressure they are feeling at important competitions. It's quite a hard task to ignore the pressure and just focus on doing well. On top of that, they have to strategise on the spot. I think most of us have had experiences in doing that during exams. However, exams is just between the exams and the individual. In competitions, it's the competition, the competitor, the individual and the audience. People are watching the individual. It all boils down to how strong one's mind is to resist the pressure to succumb and keep one's mind clear. Whoever said jocks are brainless?
Anyway, wakeboarding looks quite cool. All the somersaulting on the water. It's a l'il like water-skiiing, but more extreme, isn't it? Cool. I suppose these competitors are the best their countries have to offer, and it's quite heartbreaking to see them executing their amazing somersaults and other stunts only to land on their backs in the water and having to restart it all over again. But then again, in competitions, I suppose one has to get used to failures and losing and having the courage to start all over again. They have to have strong determination to learn from their mistakes and simultaneously forget what happened the last time and compete once again. Amazing.
I think athletes are quite remarkable people. Not only do they have to keep their bodies in top shape, they have to keep themselves mentally alert and fit as well, and condition themselves to forget about the audience or ignore the pressure they are feeling at important competitions. It's quite a hard task to ignore the pressure and just focus on doing well. On top of that, they have to strategise on the spot. I think most of us have had experiences in doing that during exams. However, exams is just between the exams and the individual. In competitions, it's the competition, the competitor, the individual and the audience. People are watching the individual. It all boils down to how strong one's mind is to resist the pressure to succumb and keep one's mind clear. Whoever said jocks are brainless?
Friday, October 21, 2005
It's amazing how at one moment, something can look so promising and just crash around your ears the next moment. One moment ago, I was elated at the possibility of finishing off the project. The next, news came that we had to do one more. Now, we are so so so near to the completion of the current one, but we are short of a paragraph. Kinda reminds me of what Yi Lun said last time "Life is not perfect". Coz they were making a puzzle for her teacher, and they happened to lose a piece. They thot of that reason to tell the teacher when they gave it to her. Haha..
And of course, not helping things is MSN, which is cutting off communication between my groupmates and me. What a life.
Kudos to my group mates though. Haha, IF we manage to finish this sometime tonight, it's one milestone we've crossed. All of them played big roles in bringing the whole proj to actuality, and I know there have been times when we felt damn frustrated, but FINALLY, the proj will be done. Soon.
And of course, not helping things is MSN, which is cutting off communication between my groupmates and me. What a life.
Kudos to my group mates though. Haha, IF we manage to finish this sometime tonight, it's one milestone we've crossed. All of them played big roles in bringing the whole proj to actuality, and I know there have been times when we felt damn frustrated, but FINALLY, the proj will be done. Soon.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
I see the light..... REALLY
YES! I can really see the light at the end of the tunnel now! I know last week's one was a false alarm, but I am SURE this time it's true! The report's OK already! YES! Haha, finally, no more late nights or early mornings trying to get the report right, and no more agonising over whether the phrasing's right, or if the paragraphs are too lengthy. WONDERFUL! Haha.. It felt like a load off my shoulders just now when Mario didn't have any more to add to our report. Hmm.. But of course, that's not to say he's gonna give us high marks....
Tomorrow's the Math test. Oh man, I hope I do decently this time, otherwise can you imagine how embarrassing it would be that I got full marks the last time but failed or did badly the second time? I gotta confess, this is not merely about doing well- it's also about the widely talked-about "face". Yah... Shallow as it sounds, that's what I'm bothering about. I hope time passes faster so I can get the chose over and done with. THEN I can get back to reading my other texts which I have temporarily given up in lieu of the coming test. I wonder if this is worth it.
Tomorrow's the Math test. Oh man, I hope I do decently this time, otherwise can you imagine how embarrassing it would be that I got full marks the last time but failed or did badly the second time? I gotta confess, this is not merely about doing well- it's also about the widely talked-about "face". Yah... Shallow as it sounds, that's what I'm bothering about. I hope time passes faster so I can get the chose over and done with. THEN I can get back to reading my other texts which I have temporarily given up in lieu of the coming test. I wonder if this is worth it.
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Stupidity
Don't wanna go back to sch Don't wanna go back to sch Don't wanna go back to sch Don't wanna go back to sch Don't wanna go back to sch!!!!
I am school-sick. Sick of school. Sick of doing work. Sick of doing stupid things that kill my stupid brain cells. Sick of reading stupid things that my stupid brain cells won't be able to stupidly process, thus making me look stupid reading the stupid textbook.
If you are still reading this, you must be thinking, "What a stupid fool to write such a stupid entry that stupidly makes no stupid sense." Oh well, you are probably right...
Ever thought how the word "stupid" sounds like a pig? It sounds so fat and squashy and if I picture the word in my mind's eye, I can just about see the snout of the word. Weird. Of course, that's not saying that pigs are synonymous with stupidity. Some ppl would kill me for saying that. I'm just saying the look of the word, just like how Daimaru used to look like an accordion to me. There's a term for looking at words as pictures, but I can't remember it. Read about it awhile ago. My hippocampus must be chock-full of memories already. -_-" What utter rubbish.
Finally finished studying for HE103- Basic Maths for Economists, but the aftereffects of studying it make me feel like I didn't actually study it. Don't understand what the book is saying- well, maybe I did.. at least I THINK I understood it better than during the lecture especially with my lecture notes in such bad shape. Maybe I shouldn't bother about saving ink for pdf files since they all come out looking like **** (fill in whatever words you think are suitable). Now I'm left with trying to refine the discussions section, and re watching Modern Times. I hope there's enough time, what with us going out for dinner later and me spending the next 15 minutes or so typing this entry. Don't think I'll be able to pull another miraculous full marks this time, though I'm crossing my fingers that the paper will be easy enough for me to do respectably well. I'm not hoping for full marks, though it sure would be nice if I did... ;)
Can't wait for exams to end, then I'll be free!! No need to go to school and bust my brain cells. It sooo doesn help that Yi Lun has finished her papers and will be relaxing already and that my family is in Bedok while I'm all the way across the island! Oh well, as good as the holidays seem to be, I think I'll have to go back to join in some camp or trip planning... and I did just agree to join the hall vball team. What a joke. I haven't been playing vball for about a year already. Wonder if I can still run and jump. And I dunno where Yi Lun has put the knee guards. Hah, will I even make the team I wonder.
OK, in case you are thinking of going to get a gun to shoot me for being in such a melancholic and utterly histrionic mood, save yourself the effort, darlings. I've finished my ramblings.
I am school-sick. Sick of school. Sick of doing work. Sick of doing stupid things that kill my stupid brain cells. Sick of reading stupid things that my stupid brain cells won't be able to stupidly process, thus making me look stupid reading the stupid textbook.
If you are still reading this, you must be thinking, "What a stupid fool to write such a stupid entry that stupidly makes no stupid sense." Oh well, you are probably right...
Ever thought how the word "stupid" sounds like a pig? It sounds so fat and squashy and if I picture the word in my mind's eye, I can just about see the snout of the word. Weird. Of course, that's not saying that pigs are synonymous with stupidity. Some ppl would kill me for saying that. I'm just saying the look of the word, just like how Daimaru used to look like an accordion to me. There's a term for looking at words as pictures, but I can't remember it. Read about it awhile ago. My hippocampus must be chock-full of memories already. -_-" What utter rubbish.
Finally finished studying for HE103- Basic Maths for Economists, but the aftereffects of studying it make me feel like I didn't actually study it. Don't understand what the book is saying- well, maybe I did.. at least I THINK I understood it better than during the lecture especially with my lecture notes in such bad shape. Maybe I shouldn't bother about saving ink for pdf files since they all come out looking like **** (fill in whatever words you think are suitable). Now I'm left with trying to refine the discussions section, and re watching Modern Times. I hope there's enough time, what with us going out for dinner later and me spending the next 15 minutes or so typing this entry. Don't think I'll be able to pull another miraculous full marks this time, though I'm crossing my fingers that the paper will be easy enough for me to do respectably well. I'm not hoping for full marks, though it sure would be nice if I did... ;)
Can't wait for exams to end, then I'll be free!! No need to go to school and bust my brain cells. It sooo doesn help that Yi Lun has finished her papers and will be relaxing already and that my family is in Bedok while I'm all the way across the island! Oh well, as good as the holidays seem to be, I think I'll have to go back to join in some camp or trip planning... and I did just agree to join the hall vball team. What a joke. I haven't been playing vball for about a year already. Wonder if I can still run and jump. And I dunno where Yi Lun has put the knee guards. Hah, will I even make the team I wonder.
OK, in case you are thinking of going to get a gun to shoot me for being in such a melancholic and utterly histrionic mood, save yourself the effort, darlings. I've finished my ramblings.
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Haha, check out Evon's blog at http://yifang-sama.blogspot.com . There's a wonderful analogy on studying. Since I can't tag on her board, I shall just mention it here:
Von! I did hear it's hard to enter the Land of Mugging. I myself have been kicked out a few times for lacking the quality "Lack of Concentration". But I heard some people actually can gain citizenship into that land, simply coz they have the following qualities:
1) Unlimited source of Brainpower
2) Unlimited source of Concentration and the Ability to Prioritise.
3) Knowledge of Harnessing the Energy to Keep oneself Disciplined.
Oh well, as you can see, I lack most of this, so the most I can get is a PR. Well, that is if I do actually can bring myself to study without getting distracted lar. On normal days, think if I can get a visitor's pass it would be not bad already.
Do the rest of you agree with her blog? I also particularly liked the way she personified the printer. Haha, her blog is entertaining. Go read it! =)
Oh, I have changed my tagboard already! Hopefully this time Cbox will be nice to me and stop giving problems!! =)
Von! I did hear it's hard to enter the Land of Mugging. I myself have been kicked out a few times for lacking the quality "Lack of Concentration". But I heard some people actually can gain citizenship into that land, simply coz they have the following qualities:
1) Unlimited source of Brainpower
2) Unlimited source of Concentration and the Ability to Prioritise.
3) Knowledge of Harnessing the Energy to Keep oneself Disciplined.
Oh well, as you can see, I lack most of this, so the most I can get is a PR. Well, that is if I do actually can bring myself to study without getting distracted lar. On normal days, think if I can get a visitor's pass it would be not bad already.
Do the rest of you agree with her blog? I also particularly liked the way she personified the printer. Haha, her blog is entertaining. Go read it! =)
Oh, I have changed my tagboard already! Hopefully this time Cbox will be nice to me and stop giving problems!! =)
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
I'm bored. And sick of studying. And there's another Basic Maths for Economists test next week. I have this feeling that I won't be able to create another miracle this time.. the topics that will be tested are topics which i have absolutely NO confidence in. Crap. Cant even bring myself to study it now.... Yah, guess I'm like an ostrich. haha..
Today is the first day I watch a movie that seriously made me throw up. It DID! The movie's called "Tarnation", and I think it's a documentary if I'm not wrong. It looked like it was taken solely from a handheld camera, so the pictures were jerky... to make things worse, pictures were flashed at such speeds, and the pictures were in black and white! Think it can be compared to "The Blair Witch Project" (I initially wanted to watch it sometime during the holidays, but if it's gonna be anything like "Tarnation", I think I better skip it). Oh yes, pictures were moving fast, and the music was irritating. Punk rock with some heavy metal. -_-" The movie felt like it took FOREVER to end. An hour into the movie I couldn tahan already. Left the LT to the toilet. No prizes for guessing what I did there....
I hope NEVER to watch another movie like this again.
Today is the first day I watch a movie that seriously made me throw up. It DID! The movie's called "Tarnation", and I think it's a documentary if I'm not wrong. It looked like it was taken solely from a handheld camera, so the pictures were jerky... to make things worse, pictures were flashed at such speeds, and the pictures were in black and white! Think it can be compared to "The Blair Witch Project" (I initially wanted to watch it sometime during the holidays, but if it's gonna be anything like "Tarnation", I think I better skip it). Oh yes, pictures were moving fast, and the music was irritating. Punk rock with some heavy metal. -_-" The movie felt like it took FOREVER to end. An hour into the movie I couldn tahan already. Left the LT to the toilet. No prizes for guessing what I did there....
I hope NEVER to watch another movie like this again.
Monday, October 10, 2005
I see the light.....
I'm beginning to see the light, as 21st Oct draws nearer. Nope, not exams, if you are wondering, but the report. Haha, it's starting to disturb me quite a bit. You know, like an axe over the head? Come 21st, it'll be gone! Though I hope the report goes fine, and of course I'll continue to do my best for it, I shall be glad to see the back of it. Unfortunately, this won't be the end of reports. I foresee more coming in the semesters to come.
Oh well. I still feel a sense of achievement though, coz I finished compiling the different reports already! Yay! Still left with Pony's though, but that will soon be done come tomorrow. Right now, I wish I could greet my bed with enthusiasm, but I can't. I gotta do my HP101 tutorial. And I did promise Papa I'd try to study the Psych and other stuff another time, so... yah. I'll try my best. Really!
Ok, I'm done with the little break here. Going to carry on with my *groans* work.
The rest of you, I hope you are having fun! =)
Oh well. I still feel a sense of achievement though, coz I finished compiling the different reports already! Yay! Still left with Pony's though, but that will soon be done come tomorrow. Right now, I wish I could greet my bed with enthusiasm, but I can't. I gotta do my HP101 tutorial. And I did promise Papa I'd try to study the Psych and other stuff another time, so... yah. I'll try my best. Really!
Ok, I'm done with the little break here. Going to carry on with my *groans* work.
The rest of you, I hope you are having fun! =)
Thursday, October 06, 2005
GOOD LUCK!!
Today has been a tired but fruitful day. Slept at 4am this morning trying to do the HP102 report (yep, the one you all read of me whining on and on about it), then off to tutorials and especially the Basic Maths for Economists tutorials. Oh my god. I thought going for the tutorial would help ease my doubts about that chapt. BOY was I ever so wrong. I ended up as blur as I was last wk. -_-"
Anyway, I went for Project Bridge at 430pm. Project Bridge is a place and a programme set up for early school-leavers between the ages of 13-18. It aims to help the school-leavers in finding a job, or helping those who are still keen on getting an education get back into schools. They also target those students who are in dange of leaving school- these are the students that we are helping. We coach them in mainly Maths and Science. I think this is a worthwhile cause, and.. hmm, though I may not be joining rotaract next year, I still feel like going back there to volunteer. Haha. I was apprehensive about teaching there at first, maybe 'cos I was doubtful of my teaching abilities, and the students' behaviours, but after 2 sessions teaching there, I feel a lil more confident bout teaching them, though I think my teaching has to be improved on. *sheepish smile* Contrary to what some may think about these potential school-leavers, they are actually quite keen to learn and get good grades. They may be from the Normal stream, but they are quite smart you know. =)
I taught a guy called Yazid today. Tomorrow's his N-Levels Maths Paper 2, and I was coaching him. I hope he remembers what I taught him today man. There wasn't enough time to cover everything, and I think he started his revision very very late, so the most I could do was to help him refresh his memory on factorisation etc. Not enough time to do Trigo, though, which I think is quite dangerous, coz Trigo is an important topic, as we all know. =S He was quite encouraging too. Haha, when I said I can't draw for nuts, he said "You can do it!" in Malay (I can't remember what the words are in Malay, but there you have it). He was also quite willing to teach me Malay, like Dino. Haha... I think it was only towards the end that we started to feel comfortable in each other's presence. =) They are all very friendly, and were very open about their thoughts and their work, even explaining their art pieces to us. I hope they do well for their N-Levels and proceed on to Os and then to Poly and wherever it is that they wanna go to. =) It's amazing to know that just a few hours with them could make me feel like that, really. That's why I wouldn't mind going back there to teach. I think it's a worthwhile cause. =D
Ok, 'nuff said. I gtg back to do the Discussions section again. Haha, I'm sooo not gonna sleep at 4am today... gonna slp as soon as my hair is dry. ;)
Anyway, I went for Project Bridge at 430pm. Project Bridge is a place and a programme set up for early school-leavers between the ages of 13-18. It aims to help the school-leavers in finding a job, or helping those who are still keen on getting an education get back into schools. They also target those students who are in dange of leaving school- these are the students that we are helping. We coach them in mainly Maths and Science. I think this is a worthwhile cause, and.. hmm, though I may not be joining rotaract next year, I still feel like going back there to volunteer. Haha. I was apprehensive about teaching there at first, maybe 'cos I was doubtful of my teaching abilities, and the students' behaviours, but after 2 sessions teaching there, I feel a lil more confident bout teaching them, though I think my teaching has to be improved on. *sheepish smile* Contrary to what some may think about these potential school-leavers, they are actually quite keen to learn and get good grades. They may be from the Normal stream, but they are quite smart you know. =)
I taught a guy called Yazid today. Tomorrow's his N-Levels Maths Paper 2, and I was coaching him. I hope he remembers what I taught him today man. There wasn't enough time to cover everything, and I think he started his revision very very late, so the most I could do was to help him refresh his memory on factorisation etc. Not enough time to do Trigo, though, which I think is quite dangerous, coz Trigo is an important topic, as we all know. =S He was quite encouraging too. Haha, when I said I can't draw for nuts, he said "You can do it!" in Malay (I can't remember what the words are in Malay, but there you have it). He was also quite willing to teach me Malay, like Dino. Haha... I think it was only towards the end that we started to feel comfortable in each other's presence. =) They are all very friendly, and were very open about their thoughts and their work, even explaining their art pieces to us. I hope they do well for their N-Levels and proceed on to Os and then to Poly and wherever it is that they wanna go to. =) It's amazing to know that just a few hours with them could make me feel like that, really. That's why I wouldn't mind going back there to teach. I think it's a worthwhile cause. =D
Ok, 'nuff said. I gtg back to do the Discussions section again. Haha, I'm sooo not gonna sleep at 4am today... gonna slp as soon as my hair is dry. ;)
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Writer's Block
I hate writer's block. They always leave me with a sense of inadequacy and helplessness. Well, I sometimes find that the way around writer's block is to write about it. So here I am, trying to damndest to dissolve this meaningless wall that's standing between me and my sleep.
One thing that came to mind while thinking about writer's block: What do you do when you meet a wall? Do you
a) dig a hole under it, or
b) try to walk around it?
I think there have been many theories surrounding this question, especially theories surrounding the personalities of those who choose either one of the options. If my memory serves me right, walking around the wall seems to reflect a go-getter attitude, showing initiative blah blah blah, while the digging hole one seems to reflect a stubborn stick in the mud who insists on doing things the hard way. Well. Which are you? Personally, I don't think either one is good. What if the wall goes on forever? Is a person gonna walk the whole length of it forever? What if the underside of the wall is concrete? Is the person gonna try to dig up the concrete bit by bit? Oh well, maybe I'm just reading too much into it again. Or maybe I'm just in a bitchy mood these days.
What is it that I'm doing that gave me a writer's block? Well, I'm trying to do my part of the HP102 report, since I was mostly playing a fool on Friday during our discussion. Ironically, or not, the part I volunteered to write on is the "Discussions" section, and now I'm trying to compile Merrilyn and Si Huan's contributions together to try to form a coherent essay. I hope the paragraphs I've done are Ok- I'm left with one important part, and I don't know how to put all of it together! It's something lurking at the back of my mind, and keeps sliding out of my grasp each time I try to put a finger (or a fist, depending on whether you wanna be literal) to (or around, again, depending on whether you wanna be literal) it. It has something to do with the inconsistency of the researchers (us) when briefing and debriefing the participants, and the timing of the timers, and the scoring of the scorers. And something about the stress given to the participants. They somehow seem to fit in as one point, but I can't seem to be able to come up with a suitable beginning sentence. Argh. I don't want to leave this till the week, though, cos it would be hanging over me until I finished, and goodness knows how behind I am in my work. I haven't completed my Maths homework yet, and I haven't even read the lecture notes of it yet. That aside, there is my readings to be done this week. This is a major thing, and I don't wanna give it less than my full attention. After all, 5 people's grades are on the line here, including my own. If I'm gonna try for the exchange prog in Year 3, I better make sure I do a good job of this. And also not let my groupmates down. And also not be a sleeping member in the group. It's not a nice feeling to be a sleeping member, I realise.......
OK. Going to drink chicken soup and going back to the grind! Wish me luck! =)
One thing that came to mind while thinking about writer's block: What do you do when you meet a wall? Do you
a) dig a hole under it, or
b) try to walk around it?
I think there have been many theories surrounding this question, especially theories surrounding the personalities of those who choose either one of the options. If my memory serves me right, walking around the wall seems to reflect a go-getter attitude, showing initiative blah blah blah, while the digging hole one seems to reflect a stubborn stick in the mud who insists on doing things the hard way. Well. Which are you? Personally, I don't think either one is good. What if the wall goes on forever? Is a person gonna walk the whole length of it forever? What if the underside of the wall is concrete? Is the person gonna try to dig up the concrete bit by bit? Oh well, maybe I'm just reading too much into it again. Or maybe I'm just in a bitchy mood these days.
What is it that I'm doing that gave me a writer's block? Well, I'm trying to do my part of the HP102 report, since I was mostly playing a fool on Friday during our discussion. Ironically, or not, the part I volunteered to write on is the "Discussions" section, and now I'm trying to compile Merrilyn and Si Huan's contributions together to try to form a coherent essay. I hope the paragraphs I've done are Ok- I'm left with one important part, and I don't know how to put all of it together! It's something lurking at the back of my mind, and keeps sliding out of my grasp each time I try to put a finger (or a fist, depending on whether you wanna be literal) to (or around, again, depending on whether you wanna be literal) it. It has something to do with the inconsistency of the researchers (us) when briefing and debriefing the participants, and the timing of the timers, and the scoring of the scorers. And something about the stress given to the participants. They somehow seem to fit in as one point, but I can't seem to be able to come up with a suitable beginning sentence. Argh. I don't want to leave this till the week, though, cos it would be hanging over me until I finished, and goodness knows how behind I am in my work. I haven't completed my Maths homework yet, and I haven't even read the lecture notes of it yet. That aside, there is my readings to be done this week. This is a major thing, and I don't wanna give it less than my full attention. After all, 5 people's grades are on the line here, including my own. If I'm gonna try for the exchange prog in Year 3, I better make sure I do a good job of this. And also not let my groupmates down. And also not be a sleeping member in the group. It's not a nice feeling to be a sleeping member, I realise.......
OK. Going to drink chicken soup and going back to the grind! Wish me luck! =)
Saturday, October 01, 2005
Deaths
It seems like there is always someone we know dying these days. Just on Thursday I received news from my father that my granduncle, who had been suffering from liver cancer, had passed away that afternoon. I was also told that Yi Lun's friend's father, who had also been suffering from Hepatitis B, had passed away that same afternoon, though 2 hours later. He had slipped into a coma 2 days before and passed away while still in one. Then last week (I think), I read on Alan's blog that his junior had passed away. He had died of heart cancer. Why are so many people dying now? I was expecting my granduncle to leave us anytime, but I was still sad upon receiving the news. Though I wasn't close to him, his departure just feels too close to home. Yi Lun's friend... I was feeling shocked and sad. I was hoping that he would recover gradually and live on a few more years. Alas, that was not to be. His death was rather sad for me coz I guess I could just imagine how I would feel if I were in Yi Lun's friend's shoes. Granted, his departure was expected by his family members and they were mentally prepared, but somehow, I believe that no matter how prepared one is for the demise of a family member, the event would still be equally heart-wrenching. After all, death is irreversible. No amount of calling or screaming will make the person come back to life. I think, if I were to be in Lun's friend's shoes, I'd be absolutely devastated. I can't bear to think how I would carry on with life. Just losing Peke last year made me cry at odd times. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose one of my family members. I don't think the pain can ever be assuaged. True, people have to go sometime, but I sometimes wish we could live forever. Perhaps I sound dramatic, but... well, today just made me think about how insignificant life is, particularly when I witnessed the cremation of my granduncle.
We went to the Mandai Crematorium and Columbarium to witness his cremation. As I walked around his coffin during his last rites, I was just wondering, we live for about 70 or so years, contributing in whatever way we can, or just simply surviving, only to end up as ashes in urns after that. Why do we even bother to waste time thinking about how to hurt others and do harm to them? Life's just too short to actually do them. I'm not trying to say that I'm perfect- cos I'm definitely not, nor am I trying to be philosophical and moralistic here, but don't you think it would be nice if everyone just made proper use of their time while living to make this a better place? An idealistic plan I guess... And perhaps I'm merely building impossible castles in the air, but I'd like to think at least I'm treasuring the people who matter to me the most and making a difference in THEIR lives- my family. Making the world a better place doesn't mean one has to great things. I just think as long as they make the world of their loved ones a better place, that is as good as anything can get.
Another thing that bothered me about death and funerals was the way the procedure was made so... mechanical, so commodified, so capitalistic, and so... cold. The undertakers were doing their job just as a means to an end- that is to be expected, I guess, since the only reason why they are undertakers is because there is a demand for their services. The body they were supposed to be taking care of was just that- just another body that had to be taken care of. The rites were conducted for their procedures rather than a feeling, I felt. Like it had to be done right. Instructions were called out by the assistant of the monk (yes, you heard right. Assistants) to us, and we were expected to follow it. The whole funeral procedure was just another assignment the undertakers had undertaken. Even before the rites had been completed (to transfer the coffin from the funeral parlour to the van), the assistant was already taking out the notice of my granduncle's death from the door of the funeral parlour. Slowly but surely, every trace of a funeral having been held there was erased. It was kind of symbolic, I guess, to symbolise the erasure of my granduncle's existence from the living world after he was cremated. But anyway, I digress. I was talking about the removal of the notice. It was like, "Oh, another funeral ended. Let's finish this off and go on to our next assignment". They couldn't wait for the rites to have finished? Would detaching the notice from the door take several impossible hours to accomplish? Furthermore, as I saw the coffin being pushed into the incinerator (is that what we call it?), it struck me how cold it was. The coffin was being pushed into the incinerator by rails and machines! An efficient and impressive way, no doubt, and a feather in humanity's cap, but.... throughly mechanised and cold.
Observing the funeral was a rather horrifying event to me. Not in the ghostly sense, but rather in a symbolic sense. Humans tend to have a teleological view of themselves, but I think at the end, we are no more significant than others. After all, all we turn into is ash in the end, not gold. In Gothic literature, we are always reading about characters who face the horror of losing their identity, but in the end, that is what happens to us. We become just another body that another profits from.
Perhaps I'm having these thoughts because of my age. Or perhaps I'm being overdramatic and thinking too much. Or perhaps I'm just getting too carried away by my thoughts and depression over the events. Perhaps I'll come to see death as a homecoming when I grow older. One thing's for sure though. The event I observed today made me realise that man is fallible, and my family's no exception to it either.
We went to the Mandai Crematorium and Columbarium to witness his cremation. As I walked around his coffin during his last rites, I was just wondering, we live for about 70 or so years, contributing in whatever way we can, or just simply surviving, only to end up as ashes in urns after that. Why do we even bother to waste time thinking about how to hurt others and do harm to them? Life's just too short to actually do them. I'm not trying to say that I'm perfect- cos I'm definitely not, nor am I trying to be philosophical and moralistic here, but don't you think it would be nice if everyone just made proper use of their time while living to make this a better place? An idealistic plan I guess... And perhaps I'm merely building impossible castles in the air, but I'd like to think at least I'm treasuring the people who matter to me the most and making a difference in THEIR lives- my family. Making the world a better place doesn't mean one has to great things. I just think as long as they make the world of their loved ones a better place, that is as good as anything can get.
Another thing that bothered me about death and funerals was the way the procedure was made so... mechanical, so commodified, so capitalistic, and so... cold. The undertakers were doing their job just as a means to an end- that is to be expected, I guess, since the only reason why they are undertakers is because there is a demand for their services. The body they were supposed to be taking care of was just that- just another body that had to be taken care of. The rites were conducted for their procedures rather than a feeling, I felt. Like it had to be done right. Instructions were called out by the assistant of the monk (yes, you heard right. Assistants) to us, and we were expected to follow it. The whole funeral procedure was just another assignment the undertakers had undertaken. Even before the rites had been completed (to transfer the coffin from the funeral parlour to the van), the assistant was already taking out the notice of my granduncle's death from the door of the funeral parlour. Slowly but surely, every trace of a funeral having been held there was erased. It was kind of symbolic, I guess, to symbolise the erasure of my granduncle's existence from the living world after he was cremated. But anyway, I digress. I was talking about the removal of the notice. It was like, "Oh, another funeral ended. Let's finish this off and go on to our next assignment". They couldn't wait for the rites to have finished? Would detaching the notice from the door take several impossible hours to accomplish? Furthermore, as I saw the coffin being pushed into the incinerator (is that what we call it?), it struck me how cold it was. The coffin was being pushed into the incinerator by rails and machines! An efficient and impressive way, no doubt, and a feather in humanity's cap, but.... throughly mechanised and cold.
Observing the funeral was a rather horrifying event to me. Not in the ghostly sense, but rather in a symbolic sense. Humans tend to have a teleological view of themselves, but I think at the end, we are no more significant than others. After all, all we turn into is ash in the end, not gold. In Gothic literature, we are always reading about characters who face the horror of losing their identity, but in the end, that is what happens to us. We become just another body that another profits from.
Perhaps I'm having these thoughts because of my age. Or perhaps I'm being overdramatic and thinking too much. Or perhaps I'm just getting too carried away by my thoughts and depression over the events. Perhaps I'll come to see death as a homecoming when I grow older. One thing's for sure though. The event I observed today made me realise that man is fallible, and my family's no exception to it either.
Schizophrenic
Look what we got up to yesterday morning when we were supposed to be doing our report for our project (By the way, the authors are Merrilyn, Pony, me, and a guest appearance by Si Huan):
Schizophrenic
SIHUAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am pony pony pony pony pony here… there was a time, wheb ppl said tt Singapore wun make it
BUT WE DIIIIID~~~~~
I found a note my grandma wrote. I was quite surprised as she hadn’t came to my house for a very long time. Sometimes I wonder if she’ll ever get here. Because the last time she was telling us about her encounter with the wolf that wanted to eat her up. Luckily I went there in time to get her out of the wolf’s stomach. It was a terribly difficult operation. I was distracted several times by sihuan and merrilyn and pony who refused to help me be productive. So in the end, a fast operation that only required 1 hour (because all I had to do was kill the wolf) I took 300 days. Seems like that was a very traumatic experience. All that I am saying is starting to make no sense. But at least I knew why my grandma is not coming back anymore. She had died iof starvation and was too disfigueed because of the HCl in the stupid wolf’s stomach. Sihuan started protests on the extermination of the wolf pack. But somehow we always have this feeling that sooner or later, she would be joining in this unethical operation. Guess what my grandma wrote? Let’s be good children and be industrious. But like the naughty children we are, we decided to have our own identity. To follow what grandma says would be conforming. We must have our individuality! YES! Grandma must have passed on as an unhappy, unlucky old maid. But we DON’T CARE. We have to be like all youngsters be, to be rebellious, be in the trend of our individualistic culture.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do you think of our story? Does it make sense? I'm afraid it doesn't, otherwise it wouldn't be titled as such. Yep, that's the reason.... Ok, go ahead and faint now, the story's over! =)
Friday, September 30, 2005
I'm a BLUE Person!
Based on your answers, it appears as though your primary color is Blue. Approximately 10% of the men, women and children on the planet share your sensitive, peace-loving disposition, so you're rather special.
As a Blue, you:
-- need to feel unique
-- look for symbolism
-- value close relationships
--encourage expression
-- desire quality time with loved ones
-- need opportunities to be creative
-- compromise and cooperate
-- nurture people,plants, and animals
-- look beyond the surface
-- share emotions
-- make decisions based on feelings
-- need harmony
-- are drawn to nurturing careers
--get involved in causes
-- bring unity to society
If you're like most Blues, you are perceptive, warm, humane, spiritual, patient, agreeable, poetic, genuine,devoted, compassionate, personal, sensitive, artistic, romantic, accepting,idealistic, insightful, peaceful, caring, and emotional.
Here are a few famous Blues you might recognize: Steve Allen, Emily Bronte, Pearl S. Buck, AlbertCamus, Emily Dickenson, Jane Fonda, Mohandas Gandhi, Mikhail Gorbachev, JamesJoyce, Vladimir Lenin, Shirley MacLaine, Thomas Paine, Carl Rogers, EleanorRoosevelt, Jean-Paul Sartre, Albert Schweitzer, Oliver Stone, and Leo Tolstoy. If you would like to learn more about the patented Insight Personality System,or complete a more thorough personality test, please return to www.insightlearning.com. You are now subscribed to the free Insightse-newsletter which will give you bits and pieces of information about humantemperament each week. However, if you want this valuable information deliveredto you more quickly, please visit our on-line store and purchase an affordablewebsite membership or one of our innovative educational products. Or feel freeto give us a toll-free call at 800-320-4788 and visit with one of our friendly personality experts.
Hey, to Psych students- Merrilyn and Pony: http://www.insightlearning.com this website provides a real-life example of Internet experiments. There's a briefing before the test, and a sort of debrief after the test- the results. They also allow for questions to be asked by providing contacts. I think it's a rather useful website. Go visit it when u are free! =)
As a Blue, you:
-- need to feel unique
-- look for symbolism
-- value close relationships
--encourage expression
-- desire quality time with loved ones
-- need opportunities to be creative
-- compromise and cooperate
-- nurture people,plants, and animals
-- look beyond the surface
-- share emotions
-- make decisions based on feelings
-- need harmony
-- are drawn to nurturing careers
--get involved in causes
-- bring unity to society
If you're like most Blues, you are perceptive, warm, humane, spiritual, patient, agreeable, poetic, genuine,devoted, compassionate, personal, sensitive, artistic, romantic, accepting,idealistic, insightful, peaceful, caring, and emotional.
Here are a few famous Blues you might recognize: Steve Allen, Emily Bronte, Pearl S. Buck, AlbertCamus, Emily Dickenson, Jane Fonda, Mohandas Gandhi, Mikhail Gorbachev, JamesJoyce, Vladimir Lenin, Shirley MacLaine, Thomas Paine, Carl Rogers, EleanorRoosevelt, Jean-Paul Sartre, Albert Schweitzer, Oliver Stone, and Leo Tolstoy. If you would like to learn more about the patented Insight Personality System,or complete a more thorough personality test, please return to www.insightlearning.com. You are now subscribed to the free Insightse-newsletter which will give you bits and pieces of information about humantemperament each week. However, if you want this valuable information deliveredto you more quickly, please visit our on-line store and purchase an affordablewebsite membership or one of our innovative educational products. Or feel freeto give us a toll-free call at 800-320-4788 and visit with one of our friendly personality experts.
Hey, to Psych students- Merrilyn and Pony: http://www.insightlearning.com this website provides a real-life example of Internet experiments. There's a briefing before the test, and a sort of debrief after the test- the results. They also allow for questions to be asked by providing contacts. I think it's a rather useful website. Go visit it when u are free! =)
Slappable, I am
I seriously ought to slap myself over and over for delaying the revision for the Cinematics Class. Now I have this horrid feeling I'm not going to do well for the test tmr. I've one more reading to do- Laura Mulvey's Visual Pleasure in Cinema or something like that, full of Freudian theories which I think I'm not in the mood to read about now. It needs a fresh brain to take it in. And GREAT. I can't remember the character names from From Hell. What a fabulous way to end the week. -_-"
Oh well. It's 1237am, and from the Psych textbook, they say there's no more point cramming the night before, coz all the info will be stored in the short term memory and there's limited space. So sayonara, and I'm going to sleep now. Hopefully the test will be ok, and I'll do reasonably ok in it... I have zilch confidence in the essay I handed in to Kenneth Chan, and there'll be another essay for the exams. CRAP.
Good night!
Oh well. It's 1237am, and from the Psych textbook, they say there's no more point cramming the night before, coz all the info will be stored in the short term memory and there's limited space. So sayonara, and I'm going to sleep now. Hopefully the test will be ok, and I'll do reasonably ok in it... I have zilch confidence in the essay I handed in to Kenneth Chan, and there'll be another essay for the exams. CRAP.
Good night!
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Yesterday Once More
Yesterday was rather a blast. Went to K-Box with Jieting, Jiun Pey, Jinghua and Jinghua's friend, Yi Ling ( is that how you spell it?), and we sang from 2-7. Well, at least I think Jieting and Jinghua did, coz Jiun Pey and I left at bout 530. Dunno bout Yi Ling though.. we were supposed to have left together, but she decided to stay on a lil longer. =) Anyway, we sang song after song, and well, I must say, I feel a tad ashamed to be singing with such company. They have great voices which so put me to shame I tell you. Haha, Jieting was singing "童话" in soprano coz... I think someone was singing it in a normal voice (can't really remember). Wow, Jieting, I take my hat off to you. She went REALLY high-pitched! AND it was still in tune OK! WOW! =) Need I say anything more about Jiun Pey and Yi Ling? Oh well. Suffice it to say that they have fantastic voices, all in their own unique sense. Jiun Pey's voice, though soft, has a kind of "magnetic" quality about it, as quoted from Jieting. It pulls at people, making them wanna listen more to it. Yi Ling, well... her voice is strong, and she has what we call "台风". When she sings, there's emotion, and gestures... Makes me wonder why she didn't take part in Superstar. I didn't ask her either.
Jieting and Yi Ling went rather high yesterday. They were singing some song- forgot the title, and they stood up on the sofa:

haha.. quite cool rite? Their voices match quite well I must say, and I suggested to Jieting that she and Yi Ling should actually sing a duet for Impresario. They should!
One blip on an otherwise great day: service at K-Box. Man! So rude! When it came time to pay, I just took out all the change... didn't wanna give them tips... I mean, for wat?! Yah, I know it sounds kinda bitchy of me to do so, but... well... they ruined an otherwise fun day. -_-"
Haha, now all i have to do is persuade evon and yi lun to go with me to k-box... hmm.. mebbe we can even ask the cousins to go... Alvin, Alan, Laura, what do u think? ;)
Jieting and Yi Ling went rather high yesterday. They were singing some song- forgot the title, and they stood up on the sofa:

haha.. quite cool rite? Their voices match quite well I must say, and I suggested to Jieting that she and Yi Ling should actually sing a duet for Impresario. They should!
One blip on an otherwise great day: service at K-Box. Man! So rude! When it came time to pay, I just took out all the change... didn't wanna give them tips... I mean, for wat?! Yah, I know it sounds kinda bitchy of me to do so, but... well... they ruined an otherwise fun day. -_-"
Haha, now all i have to do is persuade evon and yi lun to go with me to k-box... hmm.. mebbe we can even ask the cousins to go... Alvin, Alan, Laura, what do u think? ;)
Yesterday
Hey, just a short note here first b4 i blog proper here....
To Jieting, Jiun Pey, Jinghua and Yi Ling (not me!! another Yi Ling) if u want the photos! They have been uploaded into my Yahoo! photo album! go there and get em if u wanna see them or upload them into ur comp k? I'll be posting some up later...
Haha, but for now, i gtg do my work... so overdue.....
To Jieting, Jiun Pey, Jinghua and Yi Ling (not me!! another Yi Ling) if u want the photos! They have been uploaded into my Yahoo! photo album! go there and get em if u wanna see them or upload them into ur comp k? I'll be posting some up later...
Haha, but for now, i gtg do my work... so overdue.....
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Hmm... Gender Difference?
Haha, Merrilyn found this article during our stats class yesterday. It's called Women like Women more than Men like Men
This article is courtesy of the American Psychological Association (APA).
Read it and tell me what you think!
Laura: for more information on Psych, you can visit this website k? =)
This article is courtesy of the American Psychological Association (APA).
Read it and tell me what you think!
Laura: for more information on Psych, you can visit this website k? =)
Friday, September 23, 2005
WEEKEND!!
Haha, it's the weekend again!! And I'm back at home again! =)
This week has passed ok lah, and.. well, its amusing actually, coz remember in my last post I said I had made a few mistakes for my maths paper? Well, as luck would have it, the mistake I had apparently thought I had made was not a mistake at all. It was correct due to my carelessness you see... I had missed out the word "false" in the statement, so I anyhow chose the odd one out. Haha... Si Huan's method worked! =)
I'm gonna try to enjoy the weekend! =)
This week has passed ok lah, and.. well, its amusing actually, coz remember in my last post I said I had made a few mistakes for my maths paper? Well, as luck would have it, the mistake I had apparently thought I had made was not a mistake at all. It was correct due to my carelessness you see... I had missed out the word "false" in the statement, so I anyhow chose the odd one out. Haha... Si Huan's method worked! =)
I'm gonna try to enjoy the weekend! =)
Thursday, September 22, 2005
YIPPEE!!!
YAY!! FREEDOM!! For the moment, at least. Today was the last paper. Not say it was done well (I made a few mistakes), but at least tests are over. I just hope not too many mistakes were made, coz the lecturer said that the final paper's gonna be hard. And Hard's just so NOT what I need for "Basic Maths for Economists".
It's such a nice feeling u know, of not having to mug so hard for once in the past 10 or so days. It's like the lid has finally been taken off. Oh, and not to mention the worry of not being able to finish revising. Argh. Don't even get me started.
Si Huan found more ppl from SADM!! Yay! So tomorrow we will be collecting like 10 more data from them, then we can submit our results to Mario and he'll analyse our results for us. That is, if Si Huan manages to get her friend to do so by tomorrow... coz i informed her rather late u see.... hee... Oooh and here's something exciting: Mario says that our experiment is worth exploring, and after we have finished with this project, maybe we should improve further on our experiment- creating a software for our experiment, then rewriting the research or something, then maybe we can try submitting it to one of the smaller Psychology Journals to be published. COOL RIGHT?! I'm so excited just thinking about it. Of course, this idea would not have been possible if not for Merrilyn. Haha... =) And, yah,though it's not one of those more prestigious journals like APA's one (that's natural... the prestigious journals have a rejection rate of up to 90% a year!), I think it's a great exposure and it's kinda flattering to know that you have the kind of research that is interesting enough to be published. =) So, Laura, isn't Psych fun?
Hehe... i'm waiting for my hair to dry, which explains this ungodly hour at which I'm still up. Supposed to sleep early tonight though.. Ooops... =X
It's such a nice feeling u know, of not having to mug so hard for once in the past 10 or so days. It's like the lid has finally been taken off. Oh, and not to mention the worry of not being able to finish revising. Argh. Don't even get me started.
Si Huan found more ppl from SADM!! Yay! So tomorrow we will be collecting like 10 more data from them, then we can submit our results to Mario and he'll analyse our results for us. That is, if Si Huan manages to get her friend to do so by tomorrow... coz i informed her rather late u see.... hee... Oooh and here's something exciting: Mario says that our experiment is worth exploring, and after we have finished with this project, maybe we should improve further on our experiment- creating a software for our experiment, then rewriting the research or something, then maybe we can try submitting it to one of the smaller Psychology Journals to be published. COOL RIGHT?! I'm so excited just thinking about it. Of course, this idea would not have been possible if not for Merrilyn. Haha... =) And, yah,though it's not one of those more prestigious journals like APA's one (that's natural... the prestigious journals have a rejection rate of up to 90% a year!), I think it's a great exposure and it's kinda flattering to know that you have the kind of research that is interesting enough to be published. =) So, Laura, isn't Psych fun?
Hehe... i'm waiting for my hair to dry, which explains this ungodly hour at which I'm still up. Supposed to sleep early tonight though.. Ooops... =X
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)